AtoZ Spike & Buffy
by ashonorion
Summary: Short stand-alone writes. Buffy & Spike, A through to Z. R&R and send out the love. COMPLETE
1. ABC

_**AN: Each letter is a story/stub INDEPENDENT from the others, Balance doesn't continue Addict etc. Nickledime17 did this A-Z thing for DA and I thought I'd give it a go for BTVS. A is set sometime in season 6, B is set early season 5, C is lateish season 5. Requests, ideas, input, criticism –all welcome. **_

**-Addict– Spike? A bad influence? Never.**

**-Balance– Sacrifices must be made.**

**-Chocolate – Standard chic flick appeal**

_**Rated M**__** – there could be sex, violence, references, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera**_

_**Disclaimer: I am ownershipless. If you want to branch from one of these thingies, let me know.**_

* * *

Ξ**Addict**Ξ

"No"

"What do you mean 'no'?"

"No you can't come in"

Buffy stood in the doorway with a look of utter determination of her face.

"Any particular reason why not?"

"You're a negative impact on Dawn."

He stared at her. "You must be joking!"

"I'm really not."

"So that's it then. Lock me out for no bloody reason?"

"There's a reason."

"Oh?"

She sighed and leaned against the doorframe. "Dawn was caught smoking at school today."

"And what does that have to do with me?"

"I asked her why, and she said why not, and I said it's wrong, and she said Spike does it."

He chuckled and she raised her eyebrows. "Sorry pet, just thought that was too good an opportunity to beat me down. Kind of surprised you didn't take it."

"Oh I did"

"Hmm"

"I told her _you_ were wrong. For some reason she doesn't agree."

"Smart girl"

Her smile didn't reach her eyes. "'Night Spike"

The door slammed shut and Spike turned around and lit up. _Bitch_.

A small figure dropped down beside him. "Sorry to get you in trouble."

"'S ok, I'm always in trouble with that hell beast."

"I'm still sorry"

He looked down and smiled at Dawn, slinging an arm around her shoulders. "I'm a vampire love"

She bit her lip. "So, your supreme evilness guards you against the nagging?"

"Nothing guards against that" he paused. "'cept maybe a spell. Should probably look into that."

"Then your point of telling me you're a vampire was…"

He twisted around and gripped her by the shoulders. "I'm already dead, smoking's not going to kill _me_. Might kill you 'though."

"It could kill you. With the fire I mean."

"Dawn…"

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah. I know, I know. No more smoking."

"That's my girl"

The front door opened again and Buffy glared out. "Dawn. In. Now."

Dawn wrapped her arms around him. "Can Spike come too?"

"No. Spike's busy"

"Doing what?" he asked.

She glared harder. "Decomposing."

_Ouch_.

Dawn kissed him on the cheek and ran through the door and up the stairs. Buffy's glare softened as he came closer until he was leaning in the doorway. He reached his fingers forward and brushed them up from wrist to shoulder and around her neck. Her heart rate accelerated and her breath hitched. He leaned forward until his lips barely brushed against hers and skimmed along her jaw line, resting beside her ear. "I'm not the only addict here, love." He pulled back and shrugged at her annoyance, turning and walking down the path. "You know, the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem!" he called over his shoulder as he disappeared into the night.

* * *

Ξ**Balance**Ξ

Buffy felt an instant twitch in her nerves when she entered the room. The walls were laced with rich silk drapes in blues and greens. There was a woman in the centre of the room dressed in typical gypsy garb, which should have indicated how much of a crazy idea going to a fortune teller was. _He, he the slayer visits a fortune teller. That's one for the books_.

She sat down opposite the woman and waited for her to open her eyes. Gnarled hands flew forward and gripped her wrists, holding her to the table and when the old woman opened her eyes, any cause to struggle was drained from her blood. The woman's eyes were white and a trace of black script shifted over them in a language she couldn't read.

"Slayer" The woman whispered.

"Huh?"

"You are the vampire slayer." Her voice was a dull tone in her head.

"I don't…"

She chuckled. "You don't have to admit it child. I know what you are."

"Okay, kind of creepy now, I should be…"

"You are facing much adversity"

"Isn't that always the way. I really should…"

"Someone will die."

She froze. "What? Who will die?"

The woman paused for a moment before softening her voice. "The balance is askew. You must…"

"Who will die?" Buffy yelled.

The woman smiled. "That is your decision to make. Many will die, or one will die."

"Oookay, I'd be going with one."

"The consequence is unavoidable. But you may choose for one you hold dear, or one you loathe."

"Again, the choice really isn't difficult."

"I see a name…"

"This should be good."

"Dawn…"

"Not gonna happen. Door number two please."

"The other…William"

"So let me get this straight. I get to dust my worst enemy, save the world and prevent a messy ending for my sister."

The woman nodded and Buffy's face split into a grin. She paid her and flounced out the door, ignorant the wicked gleam in the woman's eye.

* * *

Ξ**Chocolate**Ξ

She smelled the smoke before he even entered the door. _Oh great_.

"'Lo kitten, what cha watching?"

She looked up at the vampire breathing hard from his run through the sunshine. "How to lose a guy in 10 days"

He groaned and plonked down beside her. "You can't be serious?"

"Hey! You watch 'Passions'"

"That's different innit? Passions has plot, unlike this fluffy poof fest with men who wouldn't know seduction if it bit them where their balls used to be."

She opened her mouth to argue. Shut it and shook her head. _So not worth it_. She snapped some chocolate off the block and bit down angrily, turning back to the screen. Spike's hand moved for the packet and she slapped it away.

"Slayer" he growled.

"Not a chance Methuselah"

He folded his arms across his chest and Buffy enjoyed five minutes of Spike sulk time before he groaned louder and waved at the screen. "How can you watch this shit?"

"Oh c'mon, it's cute and romantic."

He stared at her.

"What? It is."

More staring.

"Oh, shutup"

"That's not romance. That's what happens when someone animates Barbie and Ken."

She bit back a laugh and focused a glare. "So says the vampire. Whose last fling was with a complete loon"

"Yeah, and I romanced her every day"

"Oh please"

He went back to sulking and Buffy kept watching the movie. A kiss came on screen and Spike smirked. Her head whipped around. "What's so funny?"

"Nothin'. I just think I worked out why you like this crap."

She raised her eyebrows. "And why is that?"

"Because that guy is exactly like your ex. Watching this loser kiss must make you feel better about the lack of chemistry on your part."

"Angel and I had tons of chemistry. We had chemistry to burn. It was a friggin' chemical meltdown."

He snorted a pure look of horror on his face. "Not the old man! The other one. Captain America. What's his name…Riley"

She pouted and mumbled under her breath.

"What was that?"

"I _said_, it's better than kissing a corpse with no sense of style and a disturbing obsession with bleach."

"Have we kissed, pet?"

"Ha, you wish"

"Well then you're not one to judge, are you?"

She glared again and turned to focus on the movie. It ended with the guy getting the girl and she couldn't hold back the small happy sigh. Spike shook his head in disgust. "_What_?"

"You've never been kissed"

"Are you insane?"

"Tell me true, did you ever feel fire at the brush of skin or have all your boys been as clean cut as that?" he nodded towards the screen.

"Angel was…"

"I'm not talking about love, pet. Love is a cute little fluttery ball of fluff. I'm talking about passion, heat, blood."

"I had that with…"

"We all know what happens when my sire gets some action so don't try and tell me he fulfilled every need."

"You bas…"

"Yeah, yeah. I know. Don't touch the sacred topic. He was a god. A big lanky, abnormally foreheaded god."

"You have no right to…"

"Spare me." He got up and stalked towards the door. She stalked after him and turned him to face her. "Sorry, did I leave out the pms?"

Her eyes flashed and she threw a punch. He caught her wrist and trapped the other one before she could move, backing her into the wall and pressing his body against hers. She started lifting her legs to swing out and he pressed his leg between them, rubbing her through the pants. She gasped and he moved forward to capture her lips with his.

He was gentle and soft, and totally unexpected. His teeth slid over her bottom lip until her breath hitched and he took it into his mouth. Her body relaxed against him, forcing her to hold onto his shoulders as he kissed her deeper and slipped his tongue inside. The burn intensified and his hand slid under the back of the top, caressing the small of her back before shifting lower and pressing her closer into him. She moaned against his mouth, her body instinctively moving against his. The kiss broke when he drew back, the smirk broken by the darkened eyes and hardening against her.

"Now, you've been kissed." He said and headed out the door.

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Blue button. It makes me happy.**_


	2. DE

_**AN: Nickledime17 did this A-Z thing for DA and I thought I'd give it a go for BTVS. A dramatically fluffyish two. **_

_**-Denial - Set after season 5 of Angel. **_

_**-Eyes - Set in that crossover period with Spike after season 7 of Buffy and before he came back. **_

_**Rated M**__** – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. There could be sex, violence, references, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera**_

_**Disclaimer: Ownership is down the long, long road and I've got a flat tire. No owning. You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. **_

* * *

Ξ**Denial**Ξ

Demon bars were all the same, but William had a following at this one. Figured demons would be the only ones to appreciate his particular lack of genius. He laughed softly and took another tempering swig of beer.

"Spike!" Clem came up behind him and slapped him on the back. "Slayer said you were dust"

_Slayer_. He shook his head and slapped on a smirk. "Takes more than an apocalypse to kill me"

"I'll say. So what ya doing in LA?"

"Live here"

"Same city as Angel huh?"

"Yeah"

"_Clem_!"

"Uh-oh. Trouble's coming." A woman with long dark hair and blue eyes came up beside them at the bar. "Uh Spike, this is Cathy."

He tipped his beer in greeting. "Pleasure"

"Likewise" she turned to Clem. "You know what I think about you going to these kinds of places."

"But…"

"No buts. They're dangerous and I won't have you getting hurt. There are plenty of places you can drink at without risking your life."

"But…"

"I said no buts." She scowled and gripped his arm, dragging him out the door. "It was nice to meet you Spike, come to see us sometime."

"Yeah, we got a black round the corner from Wolfram and Hart. Or where it used to be."

He turned back to the bar and traded an amused look with Syphon the bartender. "What was that about the Slayer?" Syph asked.

"Oh, you know. Boy meets girl. Girl beats up boy. Boy falls in love. Girl beats up boy. Boy dies. Typical American yarn."

Syph grinned. "Sounds fascinating."

"Really not."

"Spike's up!" He called to the bar and thirty eyes flew to the chair.

"Not tonight fellas, got me a date with darkness here and don't intend to leave until I find it." He smirked at Syph, who just looked smug.

"He's gonna tell a story!" Excited murmurs flew through the crowd. Little known fact that vamps didn't tell their history. Apart from the killing and maiming of course.

"No I'm bloody well not!"

Syph grinned. "About the Slayer!" The excited murmurs turned urgent and Spike flashed Syph an evil glare. He smiled triumphantly in response and gestured towards the stage. "Up you go. They won't leave you alone until you do."

Spike inched his way to the stage and plonked himself down on the chair. He didn't want to tell the story. Part of his past. Over. "I met her at a club…"

He sat there and told the whole sodding tale, right down to the embarrassing chains and shrine phase. Switched his drink to shots to keep the confidence and let the memories wash from brain to lips. Kept going until the dreaded words left his lips "No you don't. But thanks for saying it."

There was nothing but silence in the crowd. Silence and a particularly emotional Vajnu demon sobbing in the corner. Spike shrugged and swaggered back to the bar.

"But she loved you" a vampires called from the room.

"No she didn't. Dying man's last wish doesn't make it real."

Something hit him in the back of the head. "What the bloody…"

"You asshole!"

He turned and another high heeled shoe flew at his face. "You stupid vampire." Purse. "Sacrificial bastard!" Bag.

"What the bloody hell are you on about you stupid bi…" He looked up at the tear-stained face and crossed arms. "_Buffy_?"

"You're not supposed to be alive. You're supposed to be dead."

His mouth moved and finally spat out the words. "Uh, Sorry?"

She growled and flew at him, claws out. "All that time! All that fucking time wasted crying and getting over you and telling myself you were in a better place. That I shouldn't try and bring you back because I could never make you happy and I couldn't take that away from you. All for nothing! You're here, you're alive, and you didn't even tell me!"

He had a death grip on her wrists and was barely winning the battle. "Luv…"

"Don't 'luv' me. You don't get to come back and make with the pet names like you're you."

"Oh balls" he twisted her around so her wrists were behind her back and pushed out the door with a firm glare for the other demons not to follow. "Buffy I…"

She snatched her wrists away and turned from him.

"What do you want me to say? You needed to move on with your life, Slayer. We both know I would have held you back."

"You didn't give me the chance to decide if that was what I wanted"

"Damn right! You think you owe me luv, you don't. I knew if I died the champion you would be able to let it go. Let me go. You didn't love me Buffy, but you would have been with me anyway on account of me doing a good thing."

She whipped around. "You think I'd whore myself out like that?"

"That's not what I…"

She swung out and he let her, almost smiling at the familiarity. She gasped and instantly put her hand back to his face, stroking the skin with wide eyes. "You're real…" The tears started again and he pulled her hand away.

"Buffy" he said softly and her eyes met his. "Forget this. Forget you even saw me."

"You're kidding"

"Not gonna weigh you down anymore. I'm not good for you and we both know it. You live your life, I'll live mine. As far as we're both concerned, I died in that apocalypse and never came back. Just live."

She stepped back and crossed her arms. "What are you, Angel?"

His eyes flashed in resentment.

"Who are you to decide what's good for me?"

" 'S easy to know when I've been the thing that's bad for you."

"Fuck you!" The hand flew forward again. He smiled, _God I've missed this_. "I'm more than capable of making my own decisions."

"Yes, you are. But not mine."

"I never wanted to…" she paused and glared at him. "Tell me you don't love me?"

" 'S not enough"

"Say it."

"You know I can't"

"You want out? Earn it. Tell me you don't love me."

He looked into her eyes with as much hatred as he could muster. "I'll love you 'til I dust. If last time's any example, longer than that. I'll still be loving you when you're nothing more than bones in earth. Doesn't matter. Can't give you what you need. Not capable of it. Being loved. Don't fool yourself with a worthy corpse."

"Ignorant bloody bastard" she mumbled.

He smirked and tilted his head to the side. "Gotta go luv. Best of luck, yeah?" Then turned and started walking away. A hand gripped him and threw him back into the wall. "Hey! Ruining my exit here."

"You're not leaving me"

He smiled. "You're strong, Slayer. Can fight your battles without backup."

"I need you."

"You really don't."

"There you go being all Angel again. For the last time, I don't need you to tell me what I need." He pushed up and dusted himself off. "You're not leaving"

"What's that spin? Can't tell me what to do." He moved off again and she kicked out his legs, pushing him to the floor. "You have some serious issues, you know that?"

She glared down at him. "I'll give you a choice Spike. Come with me. Or come with me."

"The difference being."

"Well, you can come willingly, or not."

He smirked. "Gonna beat me all the way to Paris are you?"

"Got an apartment in LA, it's not far."

His eyes darkened. "Why can't you just leave it alone? What have you got against being happy?"

"I love you."

"You don't."

"I swear if you try and rule over me one more time I'll…"

"You'll what."

She mirrored his smirk. "I'll claim you."

He glared. "You wouldn't. White hat, free choice and all that fluffy stuff."

"You're coming home with me."

"No."

'I can't live without you, damn it!" She collapsed on the ground beside him and put her hands over her face. "You don't know what it was like. I thought you were dead all this time but something inside me wouldn't let go. A part of me knew you were alive. Then there was a call from one of the LA slayers, saying that you were.

I didn't want to believe it but I couldn't stop thinking what if it had been true? So I came. And you're here. And now you're trying to tell me you won't stay. I won't take it, Spike! I love you. You don't want to hear it, but it's true. If a claim is the only way to prove it to you then a claim is what I want."

Something snapped inside him and he reached for her wrapping an arm around her waist and another around her neck, pulling her to him. She tipped her head up and he kissed her. Lazily sliding his tongue along the part of her lips before tasting her mouth with vigor. It had been too long. Too long since he'd touched heaven and came back alive. Her arms flew around him, she dug her nails in and pressed closer.

Desperate for air, she dropped her head and nuzzled into his neck. Her nails firmly lodged in his skin ensuring that like it or not he was stuck there.

"Don't leave me" she whispered.

"Never."

* * *

Ξ**Eyes**Ξ

It took one month, a visit from Angel and a pair of blue eyes at the mall to do it. She broke. Came through the door, shopping bags in hand and ran up the stairs after mumbling an excuse to Willow. She sunk down on the side of her bed and let the emotions she'd been suppressing since the apocalypse take over.

She didn't need him. She knew she didn't need him. For a month she'd been proving the fact, demon beer style. 'Buffy strong!' Her voice would say.

She was stronger with Spike.

Angel came by with lots of words that made no sense. Her mind just wasn't there anymore. It had followed her heart and sunk to the bottom of the cavern with just enough strength to close the door on Willow. She didn't want logic. Didn't want to be snapped out of it. She was done.

Always loved the beach. Her mind took her where the sand was white and clear and the ocean broke sapphire on the shore. She could feel him, a dark touch running up her spine. "I knew you'd be here." She said.

Arms came around her waist and she leaned into him. "Course I'm here. Never left."

"Feels like you did."

"Should. You need to move on Buffy. Not fair on you to keep neglecting what you need. Never would have wanted it."

"It's not fair."

"Never is pet."

"Want to stay here."

"You can't."

She paused. "I know."

She turned in his arms and pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth. "Missed you"

His eyes softened. "You should go."

She gripped him tighter. "No."

"Have to keep on living."

"Not leaving you this time."

"Never did."

She reached up and traced his jaw with her finger. Those eyes that openly betrayed every emotion. A voice that betrayed his intelligence. A body that moved with her like they were waves and sand. Unconditional love, unlimited passion. A fucking saint with a demon body.

_All hers._

"Can't go on without you"

"You don't have a bloody choice"

"I love you."

He smiled and stroked her hair. "Do you?"

She nodded.

"Then I'll see you again. In this life or the next."

"You think?"

"Well they can't bloody well keep us apart, can they?"

She laughed and nuzzled closer. "Maybe I'll just stay here until they work it out."

"Sounds good to me."

"Yeah."

Pause.

"You don't actually expect that to work do you?"

"Shutup Spike."

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Blue button. It makes me happy.**_

_**I love you guys! Reviewin' me an all. Makes with the warm fuzzies. **_

_**Furthermore, if I screw up (and very likely I will). Let me know where because the idiot that I am will most likely do it repeatedly. **_


	3. FGH

_**AN: My muse packed her bags and left me with half a brain and a bottle of vodka. This is my excuse. I'm a certified spuffster, but these came with conflict rather than fluff. Le sigh. **_

**_- Family __- Spike in the last scene of Chosen, while he's burning._**

**_- Genocide -_****_ 5 years after Chosen where humans have just found out about the demon world._**

**_- Hiding - _****_During the NFA apocalypse. Sorta like relationship therapy with sidekicks.  
_**

_**Rated M**__** – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. Also if it requires a rating, it could be here.**_

_**Disclaimer: I could pwn you til tomorrow and still no owning. You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. **_

* * *

Ξ**Family**Ξ

It was all so clear then. In the pain and the light and the voice of the one he had loved. Who hadn't loved him. She begged him to stop, to come with her. He knew what it was. Saw it for the first time since he met her. Felt it with every burn swallowing his corpse. If he was worthy it wasn't for her.

She'd given him the amulet like rewarding a child for good grades. '_You've been a good boy, here's a cookie_.' How much time had he wasted trying to get the elusive crumb of approval? He knew then as she probably knew that he would die for it. _Was it worth it?_ Die for a shred of forgiveness, appreciation, affection. Still never love.

He looked into her eyes.

The answer was no.

His fingers moved to take off the stone and get on with life. Now with such clarity in his grasp, it seemed unjust he'd be denied its use. But then there were faces. So many faces, and most of them cruel. Then there were faces with gentle respect and admiration. Then there was Dawn curled up in his lap with tears staining her face, Xander looking at him with something other than hatred, Anya talking about her conquests, Willow's guilt as if his opinion meant something.

He was the black sheep in their little fucked up family. But he was still family.

She said the words _'I love you'_. He told her that she didn't. He smiled and she ran.

_Some things never change_.

His hand burned and ash filled his mouth.

_Then again, some things do_.

He laughed at the irony. A man who didn't know how to live until he died. A vampire that didn't know how to die until he lived. His voice the only thing left, he let it ring into the darkness, while the last of him swept away.

* * *

Ξ**Genocide**Ξ

Buffy watched the press conference on TV for what seemed like the fiftieth time that week. _"Vampires and demons are real and must be eliminated…it's time to take back our streets…stakes, holy water, crosses…blah, blah and more blah."_ Five years. They waited five years after the first went crazy with the evil before they decided it might be time to alert the public?

Damn politicians.

She had found Clem dead on the side of the road the week before. Bloody and beaten with one arm severed, and what looked like burn marks across his face. The public had reacted to the news in the most primal of ways. Kill. Not that she should have minded, since most of the vampires and a large number of demons were evil beyond words. But without all the information and proper training, everyone was fair game. Even the slayers.

Now she ran past the burning cars and over the bodies littering the streets, searching for one dark haired vampire. It took her four hours to find him. Hanging from a streetlight in a makeshift noose.

She whispered his name and ran to him, snapping the rope and letting the body fall to the ground. "Angel!" she cried again and slapped him. He wasn't dust, but he wasn't responding.

"Funny how quickly your species adjusts to the demon world, isn't it?" a silky voice mocked her. She turned to face the blonde behind her and he smirked openly at the lack of shock on her face. "Guess Andrew told you I was back."

"No." Her voice was rough in her throat. She turned back to Angel. "Why isn't he waking up?"

Spike knelt beside her, leaning over his sire. Something dark and menacing came off him in waves as he lifted the vampire's shirt to reveal a hole. "Say what you will about vampires luv, we make a clean kill. When you're dead, you're dead. You humans…" he trailed off. "You're a different kind of monster."

She snorted. "What do you mean. Bullets don't kill vampires."

He shoved his fingers into the wound and pulled out a small, blue pebble. "I introduce you to the latest breakthrough in weaponry. A round that shatters in the bloodstream sending holy water coursing through a vampire's system at the slowest rate possible, for maximum pain before death. Oh, and did I forget to mention the centre is filled with a liquid that protects a vampires dust-worthy organs so the body doesn't disappear?"

She swept her hand over Angel's forehead and Spike's voice darkened.

"We're not even sure if he's completely dead. He could still be alive in there, suffering for the rest of eternity in that body. Unable to move or communicate, just feeling the holy water burning through his veins."

Buffy gasped and fumbled for a stake. She pulled back Angel's shirt and froze with the wood poised over a stake wound. Tears slid down her face and she noticed stale tracks on Spike's.

"Doesn't work. Tried already. It's protected. Can't even give him the rest he deserves."

She wrapped her arms around him but his tears had long since stopped. He felt cold and distant in her arms and she wondered how long he'd been like that. How long he'd been this stranger.

"Buffy" he whispered. "Take Dawn and the Scoobies, take the Slayers and leave. Go to one of the worlds that have accepted us. The demons."

"Aren't you coming with me." She tilted to face him.

"No. This world wants blood, and nobody knows it like I do. Not anymore" his gaze flickered over Angel's body. "Bad things are going to happen here, Slayer. Very bad things."

She leaned her head on his shoulder. "Bad things are already happening."

He chuckled and his eyes flashed amber. "Not yet, they're not. I'm sorry that it's come to this. Never thought it would. But too many good people have died, and I'm not going to defend the killers."

"You're siding with the demons."

He stood and brushed the dirt off his hands. "Leading them."

"In what?"

He flashed her a smile and turned away. "War."

* * *

Ξ**Hiding**Ξ

Apocalypses. He wondered if the plural was necessary in other dimensions or if it was just his misfortune to be posted in this one. Slayers had joined them. One in particular. _She_ brought the Scoobies and flashed him a glare that promised a hell unlike any other. Personally, he'd rather face the dragon.

Said dragon dropped to the street with a force that sent everyone shaking and falling over each other. Angel rose from its back grinning like a moron.

"Having fun are you?" Spike met his step.

"Well maybe a little."

They swung around and continued the fight, all manner of beasts ripping through their meager defenses. A couple of slayers went down. Gunn sunk to the floor. Illyria somehow managed to look bored and superior despite the torn flesh and broken arm. It was more than obvious they were losing.

"We need to get to safety!" Angel called to him.

"You're not serious!"

"Either that or die"

"Don't think hiding under the bed's gonna do us any good Peaches"

He smirked in a very un-Angel-like manner and nodded to a crumbling building. "Ask Willow if she can put a field around that."

Spike fought his way closer to the tiring witch. "Hey Red, got enough mojo for a protection spell?"

"Spike! You're alive!"

"No time for that kitten. Can you field that building there?"

She bit her lip and looked towards it. "Sure. As long as I go all veiny for a while. And, you know, don't go evil."

He grinned and nodded at Angel, gripped a stumbling Xander as he went past and headed for the building. He dropped him on the floor and collapsed by his side breathing hard. Angel, Buffy, Dawn, Giles, and a handful of nameless slayers followed suit. Illyria swept in with Gunn wrapped in her arms and Willow stood in the doorway chanting.

"Well. This didn't go the way I thought." Spike said smiling at his sire.

Angel was focused on one thing. Buffy. Who was focused on Spike. And not in the sweet little I-love-you-and-you're-special-to-me way. More of an after-I-remove-your-testicles-I'm-going-to-disembowel-you-with-a-very-blunt-knife way.

"Spike?" Dawn squeaked and jumped into his lap. "Oh my god. How could you be alive?"

"Missed you too sweet bit."

"How long have you been back?"

"A while."

She glared up at him. "And you didn't call because…"

Xander snorted, "Because he's Spike"

Buffy's voice was sickly sweet. "Dawn, go help…I'm sorry what's your name?"

"Illyria"

"Go help Illyria"

"But…"

"Now!"

Dawn sulked and untangled herself from Spike, leaving him vulnerable to the wrath of Buffy. "Uh, luv, you don't think maybe we can wait for this to be…"

"Shutup!" she sat down and glared, but didn't say a word.

He winced and turned away from her, trying to distract himself with Angel. Who looked much too amused for Spike's liking. "So what do we do now oh bore and brooding leader."

"You didn't call!" Spike flinched and turned back to Buffy.

"I don't think now's the time, luv."

"Oh, and when is the perfect time Spike? For you I mean. I'd hate to interfere with your schedule. It's not like we have anything important to talk about."

"We're in the middle of an apocalypse. I'll be happy to talk about this when it's done and there's a couple of walls between us and … hmm …_everyone_."

"We're always in the middle of an apocalypse. What makes this one so special?"

"Buff…"

"And it's not like this doesn't involve everyone here."

"Will you please just…"

"Nope. I don't think so."

He sighed and shifted uncomfortably. "I've been back for a while, no I didn't call, and yes I've been here helping the old sire. What of it?"

"Why didn't you contact me?"

"Why _would_ I contact you?" he countered.

Her jaw dropped and tears welled up in her eyes. He looked away, careful to keep his face cold. "B-but…I-I thought…" she swallowed. "I thought you loved me."

He resisted the urge to soften. "Things change."

Gunn snorted, droplets of blood spraying from his mouth and a bloody grin on his face. Dawn managed to throw him a dirty look while holding Gunn. Buffy nodded and drew her legs up and rested her head on her knees. Silence filled the room.

He rifled through his duster and brought out cigarettes, his lighter and a flask of whiskey. Xander moved closer and took the flask with a grin. "Guess it's good that some things don't change."

Spike cocked his head and offered the boy a smoke.

Giles pulled off his broken glasses and stared at the blonde vampire curiously. "Yes. It seems not much else has changed with you Spike. I wonder why an emotion strong enough for you to endure such torture as to obtain your soul, would fade so easily."

Spike shrugged and stared at the lightening sky. "Sun's coming up, might get a little dusty in here." He turned to Xander mockingly. "I leave everything to you."

He lifted the flask. "To Spike. I never liked you, will never like you, but hope you'll find purpose in the world of dust bunnies."

"You see, I really don't think it can. As much as I despise you, I do believe you've proved your love." Giles didn't move his eyes until Spike met his, the smirk on his face didn't quite master the pleading in his voice.

"Guess it wasn't as strong as I used to think it was."

This time Gunn laughed outright. Spike glared. Angel looked like it was Christmas. Willow lifted a makeshift roof on top of the building and plugged up the holes with debris. Buffy tilted her head to the side and stared at him.

He flicked his lighter. "_What?_"

"Do you really mean that?"

"Uh, yeah. What do you care anyway? 'S not like having a weepy serial killer stalking you is high on the entertainment list. And let's face it luv, the only time we got along was when one of us was dying."

"I told you I loved you. I would think that at least makes me worthy of notice when you're back from the dead."

"She's right. It's a rule." Willow piped.

Angel stepped forward. "You can't love him. He's _Spike_."

"I know who he is Angel."

"No you don't. I'm the only one who knows who he is, Buff. I spent a very long time getting to know who he is and I'm telling you, you can't love him."

"Listen to the tank pet. 'S not love you're feeling, just loss."

"Shutup Spike. Angel, what gives you the right to tell me who to love?"

He hunched and peered at her with dark eyes. "I didn't mean it that way Buffy, I just want you to be happy. Spike's not going to make you happy."

"And you will?"

He smiled. "I don't know but I'd try."

"You already tried Angel. You failed."

"B-but I-I"

Xander turned to him. "Not to come to the rescue for the walking snow-cone here, but I can count the times you made Buffy truly happy on one hand. The amount of times you caused her pain however…"

"Yes, I dare say your…relationship was riddled with more drama than Days of Our Lives." Giles muttered.

"Oh are Lucas and Sammy still together?"

"I'm not quite sure…I think the DiMera's…"

"Can we please stick to the topic?" Buffy snapped. "We could die and your last words would be about two soap opera bimbo's"

"And heaven forbid we die discussing you and Peaches." Spike smirked.

Willow giggled and sat beside Xander. "Or Buffy and Riley."

"_Willow!_"

"_Slayer_. We've both moved on, let it go."

Buffy pouted. "_Fine_"

"Fine."

"But we're _going_ to talk about this later."

"She really doesn't get the process of '_letting it go'_ does she?" Xander muttered, and shrunk away from Buffy's fist.

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Blue button. It makes me happy.**_

_**Love to the reviewers xoxo. More please! (so I'm greedy –pout-)**_

_**If I screw up (and very likely I will). Let me know where because the idiot that I am will most likely do it repeatedly. **_


	4. IJ

_**AN: These two are victims of insomnia at 4 am. Let me know what you think.**_

_**-Identity – Season 5ish? Willow does a spell to restore Spike's soul and accidentally brings William back from the past.**_

_**-Juliet – Pre-Crush. Spike's telling Dawn demon versions of fairytales. This one's Romeo & Juliet.**_

_**Rated M**__** – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. In short, if it requires a rating, it could be here.**_

_**Disclaimer: Disownership rights are mine. You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. **_

* * *

Ξ**Identity**Ξ

"_There!_ That should do it." Willow dusted her palms with a big goofy grin.

"So he's all soulful now?" Buffy jumped down from the magic shop counter.

"He should be"

"_He should be?_"

"Well it's not like it's the same curse as Angel's. I had to, you know, stabilize it a bit. Otherwise Spike would have lost it pretty quick."

"But you _did_ just give him a soul"

Willow bit her lip. "I think so."

"_Willow!_"

"There's no way to know for sure. Except, if you see him and he's got a soul he should be all boring and brooding. Like Angel."

Buffy glared.

"N-not that Angel is boring! He's totally not boring!"

"Yeah." Buffy pouted. "And, the brooding is part of his charm. And he doesn't brood _that_ often."

_Suure_. Willow resisted the urge to roll her eyes or give a very Spikey smirk. "I wonder how he's gonna take it."

Buffy's mouth twisted in an only semi-evil grin. "I think I'll go find out" she said and walked out the door.

William puttered around the streets with a look of absolute horror. It was hardly the time for an evening stroll, and lord knew mother was waiting for him. But where was he? He took in the lit houses and tailored gardens. The very air seemed alive with energy. He paused and watched a couple pass him dressed in a very strange manner and snickering when they caught sight of his. He sighed. Wherever he was, it hadn't benefited his social appeal.

A shrill, piercing scream echoed into the night and he ran towards it without a thought. He tripped and stumbled across the street and through the bushes, stopping at a cemetery. Wildly his eyes swept the shadows for the source of the noise, and he found it. A woman was sobbing and pleading while someone much larger held her still. It didn't take a genius to work out his attention was unwelcome. William moved closer only to jump back with a gasp. The man's face was deformed and his eyes glowed yellow. "_A demon_" he whispered.

The woman screamed again and her hand flew out, managing to land a weak blow across the creatures face. "_You bitch!_" it growled and drew its hand back. The sound of the crack when it hit her snapped something inside the poet. Something he never knew was there. His body stiffened and with carefully controlled steps he moved towards it. The creature barely registered his approach, only bothering with a "leave mister, nothin' to see." But William wasn't listening. He gripped the beast by the shoulders and threw him back into a tombstone.

"Run" he said softly to the girl and she bolted away.

The beast growled again and now that his rage had been alleviated, William felt the full weight of terror. "You shouldn't have done that. Now I'll have to drain you instead." It grinned. "Only since you sent away my other little snack, I won't feel the need to go gentle-like."

"N-no, p-please" William whimpered, inching back.

The creature dragged him up by the tie and brought his fangs around his neck. "Been a while since I've had one dressed as pretty as you" he mocked and the fangs pressed against William's skin. "Bet you taste sweet."

He waited. Waited for that moment of pain, his body shaking in anticipation. Then he fell to the ground and his eyes snapped open to a fine mist of dust. Beyond that dust, was a dark figure. It stepped forward and William traced its shape from the clunky black boots, black jeans, belt and top, beneath a long black duster – a bolt of awareness shot through him. He looked higher. Familiar blue eyes stared back at him with a mixture of shock, curiosity, suspicion, and final acceptance. The figure so different from his own yet so unmistakably him. William's jaw dropped as the other opened his mouth and spoke.

"_Hello William_"

* * *

Ξ**Juliet**Ξ

So what if he was a good vampire? Didn't mean he couldn't have a little fun. And what was more fun than corrupting the minds of children? His demon suggested _consuming_ the minds of children and even he had to concede the truth. Not that he would, if he could. Really.

"Oh come on! There's no way the little mermaid is real."

"_Was_ real bit, dead now. Or didn't you finish the end of that story?"

Dawn froze. "She _dies_? But what about the prince?"

"Runs off with that other bint"

"You mean he marries the witch!"

"No, no, no" he threw down the cigarette and shook his head. _Bloody Disney_. "She's not the witch in the story. She's just a normal girl."

Dawn sulked.

"Well you can't blame a bloke can you? Have a nice normal girl or a demon from another dimension who grows scales nine months of the year."

"I still think it's wrong." She sat down on the sarcophagus and leaned on his shoulder. "I mean, demons are people too right?"

He chuckled and nudged her shoulder. "Never met one with as much heart as you nibblet. Too much if you ask me."

"For once we agree." Buffy stomped into his crypt and settled her eyes on Dawn. "Time to go home, you have homework to do."

"But Spike was going to tell me another story!"

He gave her a look and she glared back. "Right, story."

"Oh?" Buffy folded her arms, obviously amused that her teenage sister could have him so whipped. He nodded and she went to sit on the couch. "By all means, don't let me stop you" she drawled.

He shrunk back. "Nothin' you wanna hear pet, just some old demon tales."

"Well apparently you've been telling my sister 'old demon tales' all evening. I think it's safe to say there's no way she'll be traumatized further."

He scratched the back of his neck. "Right then" he said throwing Dawn a wary glance. "There's only the one." She got the message and smiled to let him off the hook. After all, he was her friend and she would never abandon a friend to Buffy's wrath for longer than necessary. "Romeo and Juliet."

Dawn's eyes widened. "But that already has a horrible ending."

Spike grinned and his teeth elongated menacingly. "This one has more bite."

"Oh, _vampires_. Okay then." Dawn said happily.

Buffy coughed and fingered a stake. Spike's demon receded to a sheepish look. "Yeah, well. We'll get on with it then shall we?"

Dawn nodded.

"Well the war between the Montague's and Capulet's wasn't as petty as it seemed. The problem was of course, vampires. Well no, that's not quite right. Vampires and demons. Not that anybody saw a difference in those days. Still don't, but then humans are slow to change."

"There was once a vampire, Aham-Nirsi who was part of an ancient line of warriors, all by the same name. He himself was several hundred years old when the whole bloody thing started." He paused. "The original Aham-Nirsi was spawn of the very first vampire, and unlike others sired he had managed to hold the essence of the demon and pass it along his bloodline."

"Anyway, Aham-Nirsi took to the vampire bloodshed and mayhem with a vigor his predecessors lacked. Even his sire, who was said to be the bloodiest of them all, had to step down from the unveiled evil his childe unleashed on every continent." He coughed and swung his legs up, sitting across from Dawn. "But for this story, we'll stick with Italy."

"Ol' Aham met up with Lord Galfridus Montague in Italy. He was a pompous git and a little heavy on the sauce. When Aham-Nirsi found him drunk as anything in the local pub he felt something reminiscent of his human self. Something that said 'family.' Surprised by this he held off the kill, determined to work out why this talking blood bag of all people had caught his eye."

"He found out soon enough. Galf wasn't the kind of guy to keep his sheets clean. He had whores and booze and violent outbursts. Sometimes all at once. But when he got home, that was where the real fun started. He'd beat his wife and his daughter, calling them all names under the sun until the blood seeped out the front door and it was all Aham could do not to tear the house apart. But that gentle signal of kinship grew stronger."

"When the second month was approaching its end, he followed Galfridus home, same as he did every other night. Galfridus was angry because some poor sod had run away with his daughter and he'd hit the bottle harder than usual. When he got home that night, all that was left was rage. His seven year old daughter, Hannah and the Capulet's daughter Christiana were asleep when he came into their room. He dragged his daughter up by her neck and slurred curses about women and all their crimes. Hannah's mother came in when she heard the screaming, and tried to protect the girls. But rage made Galf stronger and he thrust a fire stoker through her chest. Aham was said to know then that Galf was the next to take the name."

"Did he kill the girls?" Dawn asked.

He gave her a look that said '_duh'_ and went on with the story. "When the Capulet's came in the morning they found the bodies of the two girls crumpled, drained and naked on the floor of the house. They found the mother lain gently on the bed, almost mocking in her casual state. The bastard even patched the wound and changed her clothes after she died. Angelus would have loved him."

A candle flew past his head and Spike bristled. "What the bleedin' hell was that for?"

"You know what" Buffy growled.

Spike smirked. "I said _Angelus_, not Angel luv. I take it you've come to your senses and worked out they're the same person."

This time the candle hit its mark.

He rubbed his head and threw Buffy a glare. "So that's how it started. With Galf in the ranks of the undead, the Capulet's believed he was the killer. Which he was. The Montague's didn't believe it and over honor a war was started."

"Nobody spoke of the details because of the pain it caused the families, and as the years went past people forgot. Right up until dear, sweet little Juliet who had the misfortune of meeting Romeo at the ball. Fell in love, and Romeo being the prat he was fell head of heels as well. But Count Paris had already picked her and after finding out about their little trysts, he got angry."

"He stormed through the forest bordering the Capulet grounds and stopped right in front of Galfridus. 'Course after all those generations had died off, Paris didn't even know the name let alone the man. Galf introduced himself as Aham-Nirsi, having taken the name from his sire. Offered him eternal life and a means to gain revenge. Paris being a little screwy, agreed."

"But like I said, Paris was screwy. The new Aham-Nirsi thought he'd go on a rampage and kill off the Montague's and maybe even the Capulet's. Instead he went straight for the girl. When they found Juliet, she was cold and her heart wasn't beating. Only natural they thought she was dead. They put her in the family crypt and at nightfall, after the mourners had left, the Count returned. It was dark in the crypt now that everyone had left, so he called his demon up to help him see. That's how Romeo found him. Crouched over Juliet's body fangs an' all. He took out his sword and cut the demon's head clean off his shoulders. Dust for all the kiddies."

"Not knowing anything about vampires, he still thought Juliet was dead. Which she was I guess, but you know, _undead_. He lay down beside her body and leaned his head on her shoulder and cried. Juliet's eyes opened and the hunger of a newly made vampire combined with the close proximity of warm blood called the demon to the forefront. She bit into her lover and drained him dry."

"When the demon was sated, Juliet saw what she'd done and that trailing humanity that follows every vampire out of the grave howled with grief. She took his dagger and stabbed herself through the heart, but that didn't work – 'cause hey, _vampire_. She stepped down from the stone, thinking that the local priest might be able to help. But her foot slipped and she fell back on a basket her nurse had filled with flowers. The handle snapped and the wood went through her heart." Spike dusted off his shirt. "So ends the story."

Dawn gaped. "So they _still_ die? That's so unfair." She got off the back of the sarcophagus.

"It's a story Dawn. Not real, just a part of Spike's very, _very_ twisted mind. Now; home and homework." Buffy stood and shoved her towards the door.

"Yeah, yeah" she muttered and turned back to Spike with a grin. "So that's the last story huh?"

He winked and she hid a smile, walking out the door. Buffy turned back to him with folded arms.

"_What?_" She continued to stare. He sighed and raised his left hand. "Fine. I William the Bloody solemnly swear never to tell the slayer's kid sister stories of ol'"

She raised an eyebrow. "It's traditionally the right hand."

"Well I don't mean it do I?" he smirked and she rolled her eyes.

"So in this detailed work of fiction do the Capulet's and Montague's reconcile their differences?"

"Why so interested pet?"

"I'm not" she said but didn't move.

He sighed again. "They found the body and dust, went back to the Montague's and partied 'til the break of bloody dawn. Happily ever bloody after." He walked towards his fridge. "At least until Aham-Nirsi and minions drained the whole Montague bloodline" he muttered under his breath.

Buffy flashed him a critical look and turned to the door. She paused with it half open. "It _was_ just fiction wasn't it Spike?"

He laughed and tipped his head to the side. "Was it now?"

"Oh Puh-lease, there's no way Juliet was a vampire. It's un-Shakespearean of you to say she was. And that's…well…just wrong."

He poured the dreaded pig's blood into his mug and sprinkled some spices. "You _could_ say it's just a story. If so it's been around a hell of a lot longer than I have. Or you could say that it's true. In which case you should really be calling me Aham-Nirsi."

"Y-you?"

He took a mouthful of blood before turning to her stunned expression. "How do you think the Master became the Master? Why do you think the story stuck around all these centuries? The legend is, Aham-Nirsi bit Galfridus, Galfridus bit Aurelius, Aurelius became the first official Master and then bit Bertrannus who sired…for lack of a better term…_our_ Master. The cuddly critter that he was. Never got _his_ name. Guess that only happens when they die. Should ask Angel, when Hellmouth freezes over and we're actually on speaking terms that is."

'_Our'_ _Master_. Buffy ran her fingers over the Master's bite mark, her eyes dimming in the memory. Somehow she'd have no trouble believing he was a descendent from the most evil of vampires, or that Angelus was for that matter. But Spike was different. She raised her eyes to his blue, now so close she could feel the cool breath on her face. "You 'right luv?" he whispered.

The mark the Master had left burned and she had a carnal desire to feel his teeth erase it's origin with his. To feel his caress on her body as he drank her deeper and moaned her name against her throat. She jerked back. _Bad_. "Sure. It's just a story anyway." She said and rushed out the door.

The scent of her arousal lingered in the air and Spike smiled. He shut the door, picked up his mug and settled on the couch, remote in hand. "Just a story"

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Blue button. It makes me happy.**_

_**Love to mrslee for her sweet words of motivation.**_

_**If I screw up (and very likely I will). Let me know where because the idiot that I am will most likely do it repeatedly. **_


	5. KLM

_**AN: Kays. Finally managed to finish this. Hope you like! **_

_**-Kiss – After all the mess. Buffy's done bakin' and goes to Angel for some lovin' not knowing that Spike is alive and well. Until…**_

_**-Lost – Spike finishes the trials but instead of hooking him up with a bright and shiny soul…well, he's a big meanie. I kept Tara 'cause I couldn't see it coming the same from Willow. Plus I like Tara.**_

_**-Mark – Uh. Story without a season. Spike loves Buffy and she knows but he thinks she doesn't love him back - for current events purposes. Angel get's his soul anchored (psshyeah) and Buffy (with pep) claims him. So why is she running to Spike? **_

_**Rated M**__** – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. In short, if it requires a rating, it could be here.**_

_**Disclaimer: I'm broke, bored, and discombobulated. Safe to say I don't own what I don't own. You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. You want something continued? Also let me know. And yeah – requests too.**_

* * *

Ξ**Kiss**Ξ

And there it was.

Thrown carelessly over the back of an armchair in Angel's living room.

It had to be a fan. Some twisted groupie who would dress like him and walk like him and try to perfect the accent. Someone who would drink and smoke to try and acquire his scent. Maybe even someone who would look at her standing there in nothing but Angel's shirt like pain personified. Betrayed and broken, and accepting that he was somehow unworthy.

After all these years of not thinking about him, she knew she was the unworthy one.

She lifted the leather from the chair and brought it to her face. It felt soft against her skin and smelled like only he ever did. But it wasn't him. The shock that went through her body when she entered the room was…from sex with Angel, not because he was close. He was dead. _Dead, dead, dead, dead._

"Soddin' hell."

It came from the kitchen. It wasn't him. _Wasn't_.

"Bastard drank all my blood. Come home early and he drinks all my blood."

She was walking to the kitchen now. He stood with his back to her, searching through the shelves of the fridge. His bleached hair was mussed and curly, like he'd just woken up. His right arm was draped across the fridge door, while his left rummaged through the shelves. His body was pure muscle, easily seen through the traditional black shirt and jeans. _God, she'd forgotten how beautiful he was_.

She reached the doorway. His back tensed and she stopped.

"Good to know you're smart enough not to sneak up on a bloke." He drawled.

She couldn't speak. Her mouth was dry, and her mind was screaming and protesting. It wasn't him.

Only it was.

He turned to face her, his blue eyes smoldering even when surprised. It was him. She'd stopped breathing. He'd stopped smiling. His eyes caught on the shirt and turned away.

"Hello Buffy" he whispered into the fridge.

_She was hurting him. She was always hurting him. Why was she always hurting him? _"Spike" was all that came out.

The fridge door shut and he didn't look at her when he brushed past. "Tell the great poof I'm back. Gone out to get blood and that he owes me for what he drank. It was imported _and_ expensive. Be back in an hour." He slid into his duster and walked out the door. Slamming it shut.

She stared after him.

The door swung open again and he stormed towards her. He gripped her by the arms and twisted her around, slamming her into the wall. His eyes swept her face and her heart raced. Hands relaxed at her wrists and skimmed down her arms and around her waist, pulling her tight against him. She fell slack into his body, trying to gather some semblance of control over the emotions twisting through her. She didn't have to. He crushed his mouth to hers, somehow still soft and tender while punishing and fierce. Somehow still more than anyone else could give her. A message given in the only form it wasn't denied.

"Love you."

* * *

Ξ**Lost**Ξ

Spike dragged himself towards the demon, leaving bloody tracks along the cavern floor. "Did it right? Earned my reward?" he slurred.

The creature circled him. Curious kind of vampire. In all his years the demon had never even heard of a creature such as him. A soul he wanted. By rights he had earned it. Still…

A clawed hand moved over the pale chest and a surge of power went through the body. It hurt. Spike screamed and howled and thought how it was just like the fucking powers to start his life of pain with even more pain. _You try to do a good thing…_

The pain wasn't going away and the room was spinning. He waited for the telltale burn, the sting of enlightenment. Waited to know what it was all about. His eyes rolled back and glanced over the demon's face. What was he upset about? He wasn't the one having 120 years slowly sucked out of him. Spike didn't know when the screaming stopped, but he did know when the darkness came. And when it did, it came without a soul.

**§§§**

Buffy paced back and forth and occasionally broke something. Usually something valuable.

"What's with the violence, Buffster?" Xander finally worked up enough nerve to ask. He'd been sitting on the sofa for half an hour, grimacing at the broken banister.

"Hmm? Oh, nothing"

"Huh. So the furniture is evil and slayworthy. Who'd have guessed?"

She chuckled half-heartedly. "Yeah"

"Okay Buff, out with it."

"Nothing's wrong Xand' geez!" she turned and stomped up the stairs, slamming her bedroom door shut behind her. She'd been feeling queasy for two hours now. Not the Doublemeat kind of queasy, the something's-wrong-and-I-don't-know-what-to-do queasy. Usually, it took an apocalypse to bring that on.

This time, she had a feeling it had something to do with Spike. Spike who'd tried to rape her. Spike the evil son-of-a-bitch whom she would be staking on sight. Because it didn't matter that she'd put him through a mental and emotional blender, beat him almost to dust until he snapped like any normal person would. Or that she had effectively ripped everything that was him into tiny pieces and then taken the one thing he had left away. He'd tried to rape her. Which proved he was as evil as she'd always said he was and therefore anything she did to him didn't really matter.

_Riiiigght_.

She ran a hand through her already mussed hair and took a deep breath. She knew, _knew_ that something bad was happening to him. And for all her self-discipline, she cared. With a shaky hand she lifted her phone and called Tara. Time to find a vampire.

**§§§**

He opened his eyes onto a new world. Literally. _William, you sod, you've really done it this time_. It was bright but he wasn't smoking, the grass was soft under his bare feet and he was wearing nothing more than a pair of loose black pants. His cuts had healed, the blood miraculously gone and his hair curled around his face. _Great. No soul and you're still a ponce_. He walked through the field with no sense of direction. Just grass and sky as far as he could see.

"Hello!" he yelled. "Not that this isn't nice an' everything. But would someone please tell me what the bleedin' FUCK is going on here!"

"Hello William." He swung around. _Angel?_

He was dressed in an open white shirt and tan pants with his brown hair long and tied back – looking like the cover of a _really_ sappy romance novel. Spike grinned gleefully. "Well, I always said you were a poofter."

Angel smirked back and shrugged his shoulders. "I always treated you like one."

"You're not him are you?"

"No." He smiled.

"So seein' as I'm a vampire and despite current pursuits…_unsouled_, I take it this isn't heaven?"

"Also true."

"So what is then? Limbo?"

Not-Angel sat down in the grass and ran his hand through the dirt. "Actually, this is a special place, with a special purpose."

Spike crouched on his heels. "Which would be?"

Brown eyes met blue. "To stop you."

Spike laughed. "_Stop_ me? I join the friggin' Slayer in the good fight after a century of paintin' the world red, then go to _get a soul,_ and _now_ you want to stop me?" The humor left him. "Tell me why you didn't stop me when I was ripping children apart in Chengdu, or when I killed my first Slayer, or when I did a million things that gave meaning to the word evil."

Not-Angel stood. "Killing's in your nature William, Killing _is_ your nature. Saving lives is not. You're going against your nature. You are the demon, Spike. Not the man."

He stood and turned away from the being, thinking of a million ways to counter the statement before his shoulders sagged and he turned back to face it. "Yeah, okay."

"Good that you're with me."

His eyes were cold and hard. " 'M not. I am the demon. Can't deny it. Most of how I see things now 's through the demon's eyes and what little of William remains is now part of the demon 'stead of the other way around. Made my peace with it. All those years ago. So what's your point? This is what I am. Guess if killin' 's my nature, 'M more than that."

"We thought you'd say something like that. But our point is, your nature has purpose. Important purpose. You were made to kill. To be evil. You joining the good fight is, shall we say, inconvenient."

"Well great then. Now that we've determined you're a pro at the guessing games and I can still screw the Powers with the best of them, I'll just take my soul and be on my way."

Not-Angel laughed and gave him a meaningful look.

Spike shifted. "Yeah. Didn't think it would be so easy."

**§§§**

"I don't know what to tell you Buffy. His essence isn't on this plane." Tara's voice was shaky and vulnerable. _Another one Spike managed to win over before he left._

"So he's dead? Are you saying he's dust?" Buffy was quite proud of her ability to sound secure and uninterested during a heart attack.

"Oh Buffy, no. His essence, well, there's traces of it on this plane. If he was dead, there wouldn't even be that. Everything that was him would be gone."

"Then where _is_ he?"

"The only explanation I can think of is that he's in another dimension." Tara hesitated in the traditional manner of everyone who has news they don't want to put into words.

"Tell me the rest."

Her voice shook more. "I can sense something connected to the traces of him on this plane. It's dark. Darker than anything I've ever felt before. Buffy, I don't think he left on his own free will."

_He never does_. "Can you tell me where he was when he left?"

"S-sure. But I'll need a couple of hours."

"Just get it done."

"What are you going to do when you find him?"

She sighed. "What I always do. Save his ass from unquestionable evil, yell, hit him a couple of times, then kiss him really hard and cuff him to the bed." She froze. "Forget I said that last part."

Tara giggled. "Whatever you say."

Buffy hung up the phone and pulled out a duffel bag. It's not like anyone could blame her. Spike looked really good in handcuffs.

* * *

Ξ**Mark**Ξ

Two bites, four words and 'bingo' a mystical connection that lasts for all eternity. TO A KILLER. '_Grounded'_, he said. '_No more curse'_, he said. '_You look beautiful tonight, I love you, let me show you how much'_. Bastard. Buffy ran through the graveyard at top speed, despite Angelus being knocked unconscious and shackled to the mansion walls. The mark on her neck burned and demanded she return to her mate. _Boyfriend gone psycho, part 2 airing on I-Hate-My-Life TV_.

Buffy slid to a stop in front of the crypt she knew so well and fidgeted. To knock or not to knock? With a wobbly grin she kicked the door open and frowned. No Spike. She stepped through the door and rubbed her arms against the cold that wasn't weather-related. She couldn't play the dumb blonde on this one. Claims weren't new ground and everything she'd been told said they were permanent. She just hoped Spike knew a loop hole, seeing as she didn't share her husband's fetish for torture.

"Spike?" she called into the darkness. No answer. With a sigh, she moved forward and slipped through the hatch leading downstairs. The vampire was sleeping. Naked. On a bed. Which really didn't bode well for the creature of the night façade. _Why couldn't he sleep in the sarcophagus like a normal corpse?_ Her eyes unwittingly traced over his muscular back and down the curve where his ass met the sheet. _Okay, so he's drool-worthy_. Biting her lip, she walked to his side and looked for a way to touch him that wouldn't induce girly swooning.

She reached one finger forward and poked his arm. He didn't budge. _Fine_. She poked him harder. Still nothing. Her eyes drifted to his ass again and an impish smile played on her lips. But no. Couldn't spank the vampire. Wrong. So very, very wrong. Instead, she dug her nails into his arm. "Spike, you good for nothin' overgrown mosquito! Get. Up." She kick the side of the bed.

His eyes snapped open and two strong hands grabbed her and threw her down. After a totally Slayerish squeal (that was more of a war cry anyway), she focused on watching his eyes flicker between gold and green, and tried to ignore the hard and sinful body pressing against her. Finally his face settled and his blue eyes looked down at her with a mixture of amusement and curiosity.

"Slayer" he said. "Be a good girl and tell me what you're doing sneaking into my crypt at night and waking me from what promised to be a really good dream." He curled his tongue behind his teeth and leered at her. She opened her mouth for verbal carnage, but he shifted so she could feel his hard length through the sheet, and yeah, no thinking after that.

"Gah…stop that!"

He smirked. "Stop what?"

_Hit him_, her inner self said. _No hitting the only source of help_, said another. "You _know_ what. Get off."

"No. Not until you tell me what the Slayer is doing in my crypt."

"I need your help." She gripped his shoulders to push him away but they didn't seem to be working. _Damn arms_. Hands traced their way down his biceps and his eyes darkened.

"Help huh? What kind of help?" he pushed tighter against her and bent down so his lips were just skimming over her pulse.

_Too much clothing. Wearing too much clothing. Gah, stupid vampire_. "Angel. Claim. Bad. Help!" she managed to mumble. It was enough.

Spike jumped back as if burned and glared down. "You let Peaches claim you?"

Her body burned for his, which was funny since Angel had permanent ownership. "Yes, but…"

"So what? You're gonna be celibate for the rest of your life?"

"Hey! He said he got it anchored."

"He lied!" Spike yelled.

"I know!" She yelled back and her lip trembled. "I don't know what to do! Angelus is back and I want to stake him but I can't because my lifeline is tied to his and I'll die." Tears poured down her face.

Spike calmed and pulled her up into his lap. "Shhh…don't cry luv. We'll just curse him again and he'll be…still the arrogant prick he always was. Why did you let him claim you, you daft bint!"

Buffy cried harder, but his words didn't so much hurt her as they did confirm how stupid she was. "I need it broken" she choked out, "p-please."

"It can't be broken, it's a mutual claim."

She pulled her head back from his chest to meet his eyes and held his arms in a bruising grip. "Don't say that! There has to be! There _has_ to be"

He sighed and ran his fingers through her hair. "I don't know what to tell you Buffy, claims are unbreakable. That's their purpose. It's forever." He growled low in his throat when she went limp against him. "They can only be challenged once and then only by one of the family."

Buffy jumped back to life. "Challenged?"

He frowned. " 'S not something to smile about, luv. A claim can be shifted to another, should they disapprove of the match. But the claim doesn't disappear. There's a fight and the claim is shifted to the winner."

She smiled shyly. "You're part of Angel's family"

His eyes widened. "Oh-no luv. An eternity of hate from you is something I don't need. And after a challenge has been made, that's it. No other vampire can challenge your claim."

"Please?"

He stood up and backed away, gripping the sheet around his hips. It was almost funny how scared he looked. "You _hate_ me. No. We'll find a way to get Peaches' soul back and you can all go make kittens."

"I don't hate you. And we can't get Angel's soul back, Willow said the spell he used to try and anchor his soul was actually mistranslated. It said his soul would be reborn, so it's been passed on to another person. I can't take an innocent person's soul just to get my boyfriend back. You _have_ to do this for me."

"No."

"C'mon, you're always saying how you could totally kick Angel's ass."

He cocked his head and narrowed his eyes. "I can."

"So why won't you?" she whined.

"Just…no. I'm saying no Slayer. Never gonna happen. No to eternity. In this case literally."

She pouted.

He flinched but set his face in a firm look. "No."

**§§§**

Buffy watched Spike and Angelus kick each other through walls and put holes in the floor with fingers, arms and legs crossed. Spike had to win. There was no way she was going to live her life with Angelus. And Spike was way cuter.

Said demon kicked Spike in the stomach, sending him crashing into the wall beside Buffy. "Just out of curiosity luv, what are you gonna do about tall, dark and stupid if I lose?"

"Dust him." She said casually.

He glared. "You die if that happens."

She shrugged. "I'm not going through an eternity like that."

His eyes got impossibly dark and his face twisted in a scowl. He caught Angelus' punch with his left hand and flipped over his shoulder, bringing his foot to his back with such force, what remained of Angelus' ribs shattered along with his spinal cord. The vampire sank to the floor, twisting to show his Childe a bloody grin. Spike was breathing hard, despite undead status.

"You can't kill me boy" Angelus chuckled. "Especially not over a useless wh-" a look of horrified shock filled his face before he exploded into dust.

Spike stared listlessly at the spot where his sire had been before turning his back on Buffy.

"Spike?" Buffy said softly.

A slight tremor went through him, but he said nothing.

She stood and inched towards him, gently putting a hand on his shoulder. Before she could gasp, he turned around and pulled her against him in a bruising kiss. Her head fell back and she was kissing him just as urgently. She whimpered when he stilled, his lips still brushing against hers. "Mine!" he demanded. "You're mine now, Buffy. No one else's. No one touches you except for me."

She whimpered with her eyes closed and tried to find his mouth. He shook her. "Say it!"

"Yours"

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Blue button. It makes me happy.**_

_**If I screw up (and very likely I will). Let me know where because the idiot that I am will **_

_**most likely do it repeatedly. **_


	6. NOP

_**AN: 'Numb' is dark. While there are a few lyrics in 'Out', it's not a song-fic. R&R pwese.**_

_**-Numb – Post NFA. A broken Spike stands outside Buffy's apartment. But for what reason? **_

_**-Out – S6. Set around the weeks where Spike and Buffy are having orgasms. Before and after Hell's Bells. Eeek! Xander and Spike are actually getting along. What binds these two manly, manly men together? **_

_**-Paternity – S4 (Just before 'Goodbye Iowa). Tracin' back the boredom.**_

_**Rated M**__** – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. In short, if it requires a rating, it could be here.**_

_**Disclaimer: I say again. I. Do. Not. Own. This. Show. But because I'm cute and snuggly I get to use it on Sundays and drive it on Wednesdays. Make out in the Desoto on Fridays. And be Spike's certified pervert on Tuesdays. You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. You want something continued? Also let me know. And yeah – requests too.**_

* * *

Ξ**Numb**Ξ

He showed up outside her apartment, swaying slightly in a drunken haze and stale tear-tracks down his face.

"Come in Spike" she said. He leaned on a gilded long-sword stained in blood, his body void of the usual smug and swagger.

"I'm not like you" he said.

"What?"

His mouth turned without feeling. "I figured it out you know. You had trouble trusting people. I had trouble trusting people. Always scared they were going to let me down. They always let me down" he whispered.

"You're bleeding, what happened? Come inside, I'll call someone to get you blood."

"Sometimes people make it through, you know? They make it into your heart, your soul and soon you're trusting them with everything you have. You're burning. You're falling and they're not there to catch you. They can't, you're too heavy. But it doesn't matter because _you_ don't matter, they do. So you catch them. Because you can take the weight."

"Talk to me dammit! What happened?"

"I think I mattered to him."

"Who?"

"He'd never say it, but I think I did. Means more than it should."

_The apocalypse_. Angel had called her to let her know, maybe in his own way, asking her for help. She should have been there. She reached out and stroked his cheek but got no response. No words, no movement. Just cold skin stained in blood.

"I can't trust, I didn't trust them. But unlike you, it doesn't come from the people I love, leaving me. It comes from the people I love being taken from me. It doesn't seem like a big difference but it is. It's choice, control. They're taken and I'm alone. But I can't stop it and they can't stop it. They don't want to leave, but someone or thing turns around and says that being has no purpose. When their purpose was me."

He blinked and his eyes saw her for the first time since she'd opened the door.

"The tin-man who never lost his heart. Hollow save for the lack of beating. My curse. Not a soul but a heart. To feel. You make me feel." He reached out as if to touch her, but let his hand drop short. "No more."

She wanted to call someone. Giles, Dawn, Xander, Willow, anyone who could fix this but she couldn't leave him and he wouldn't come inside. "Spike, please."

"I have choices now. When something you need is taken you have to make choices."

"What was taken? It's the apocalypse, isn't it? Please talk to me!" He ignored her.

"Choice number one: bring them back" he gave a hollow laugh, "but since they're all dead, that one's out."

"_Dead?_" she whispered.

"Two: forgive. But no one remembers that for which they were forgiven do they? I want them to remember. This pitiful excuse for a world should remember."

She should have been there, but she'd been too proud, too angry. Angel had traded sides, she told herself. Now they were all dead?

"Three: revenge. For which you lose your soul. Or at least, neglect it until the work is done."

Spike taking on the Powers. It was so like him. But she didn't smile, because he didn't smile. He looked truly dead for the first time in his unlife.

"I can't bring them back. I can't forget them. But perhaps, for a time – I could forget the soul that makes me like you. The one tearing this body apart with grief. And use this hollow form, to kill everyone who discounted lives that meant so much, with a righteousness that means so little."

She froze when the words hit her mind. He wasn't after the one's who took the lives, but the one's who allowed them to be taken. With a look of combined shock and horror, she raised her eyes to his. The emptiness was so much more. A darkness that was all-consuming.

"And so we begin." The sword swept forward.

* * *

Ξ**Out**Ξ

It wasn't planned. It just happened. Neither of them would admit it happened. But it was there, lurking in the shadows like a big, evil…thing. And every Friday at the bar, it found a way of happening again.

Xander and Spike were singing.

In their defence, they were drunk. _Very_ drunk. But then, the reason they were very drunk was so they would have a defense should someone catch them singing karaoke at a demon bar on Friday nights.

The first time it happened was an accident. Xander and the other Scoobies had gone to the Bronze as they did most Friday nights. Buffy was late from slaying and Spike showed up, sneering at their little group.

"_You can't even have a good time until the Slayer tells you how." He'd said._

"_Like you're doing so much better?" Xander shot back._

_Spike smiled. "Heading for a demon bar, actually. Don't 'spose you want to come Whelp. Might be a little too entertaining for your tastes. Takin' this is how you usually spend the weekend."_

His words had an unexpected affect on Xander, as t he only male in the group. The things he had to hear about since high school would send lesser men screaming for the hills. Nobody should ever know that much about the opposite gender.

"_Okay." He said._

_Spike looked shocked. "What's that?"_

_Xander stood up. "I said okay. I'll come."_

"_Right." He smirked. "Off we go then."_

And that's how it happened. In a room full of demons, mutilating the hell out of Mariah Carey (not that it was much of a difference.) The vampire and the human glared at each other and threw down whiskey until they worked their way to civil conversation. Several bottles later they were best friends. The kind of best friends that have no secrets.

Xander knew Spike was sleeping with Buffy and surprisingly didn't care (alcohol being a many splendid thing), Spike knew Xander was having second thoughts about marrying Anya and being totally whipped himself, sympathized.

Three Fridays more of the same and the conversation took a new turn.

_Xander looked at the stage. "All the girrles go fffor the sexcy demons."_

" '_S only 'cause they is singing." Spike slurred._

"_Wealy?"_

"_Yep."_

"_So why isin' we singing?"  
_

" '_M enjoyin' the sh-shhh-show and you're emotionably stunted."_

"_Oh." He said. "Fuck that." He stumbled towards the stage. "C'mon dead boy." _

Spike followed. They sang Abba.

Now, they stood on the stage drunk to the point where their camaraderie could be excused with the proper slurring of words, and not to the point where the Abba incident could be repeated. Xander had left Anya at the altar and Buffy had broken it off with Spike. It was Running Away by Fuel.

"_Eeeevery day you're on my mind  
Pain is feeling passing time_

_But if she found out about you she would die  
And if I have to live without you so would I"_

_  
_It vaguely occurred to Xander they sounded gay (although that opinion boat probably sailed with Abba). Then he wondered if they were. Spike was attractive and well-muscled. He could do worse.

"_Heeaaarts are never made of stone  
Paaain will cut you to the bone  
But I know that holding you is all so wrong  
So tonight's the last we'll ever be alone"_

Spike gripped Xander tight and leaned into his shoulder, bursting into drunken tears and mumbling something that sounded like _"Buffy."_

Xander joined him with machine-gun sobs. _"Come baaaack! Anya" _he howled as they stumbled off the stage.

_Damn the primal manliness that insisted they were straight. _

They got five shaky steps before bumping into a gaping Buffy, Angel, Willow and Anya. Tara smiled at them reassuringly. "You guys were great" she said.

"Thanshyou. You're a good, good witch" Xander mumbled.

"A good witch" Spike agreed. "You a bad witch" he said to Buffy.

Xander nodded and tried to glare at all the Buffies.

"How long has this been going on?" Buffy said, glaring at the two drunks with their arms slung around each others shoulders.

"Yes. If you were having orgasms with Spike, Xander you really should have told me. I would have wanted to have orgasms together. People about to get married share orgasms."

"Sshe's right you know." Spike slurred.

"We 's not sharing the org- we 's not shhhleeping together."

"Right." Spike nodded. "No orgamas."

"Spike?" Angel said concerned.

"Sire!" he said letting go of Xander and stumbling towards Angel, giving the shocked vamp a hug.

Xander whimpered. "No orgasms. I want orgasms."

Spike stumbled back to him and patted his head. "We get orgamas." He turned and pointed to two vengeance demons in the corner. They caught sight of them and giggled.

"You ladies want orgasms?" Xander yelled before four arms gripped him and Spike, dragging the boys backwards out of the bar.

**ØØØ**

_One week later…_

Buffy slammed the dishes into the sink with a crash. "I said no."

Spike grinned. "Yes, but why are you saying it?"

"Because it's indecent exposure."

Xander pouted. "Is not."

Anya walked in. "He's right Buffy. You didn't hear the Garwak demon singing 'Memories'."

"I think I liked things better when you two hated each other." She grumbled.

Xander and Spike traded a grin and got up, heading for their coats.

"B-but, I said no. All determined and slayer-like." Buffy pouted. Spike walked up and pecked her on the mouth..

"You're only sayin' that because of those demon girls."

"Hey, you think they'll be there?" Xander said enthusiastically and Anya hit him.

Buffy wrapped her arms around Spike's neck and smiled sweetly up at him. "Spikey"

"Yes pet?" Spike looked warily at his Slayer.

"If you offer anyone orgasms again, you'll spend the rest of your unlife a eunich" she growled.

"I love it when you talk dirty." He kissed her senseless and pushed her away, bolting for the door. Xander hot on his heels.

* * *

Ξ**Paternity**Ξ

Giles gaped at the open page in front of him and flicked through the emails send by the detective agency in London. Cleaning his glasses seemed like a good idea, but then he wouldn't see the page and he needed to see the page. _No, it couldn't be._

"Okay Giles, I know I'm late but I totally have a good excuse."

He looked up as Buffy entered his house.

She pouted. "Well, no I don't but really, what did you expect? You said the word 'research'. You should never say the word 'research' when you want me over straight away. You should say 'demon' or 'Spike'.

His eyebrows shot up.

"As in, 'Spike's chip is out and we can stake him now'" she added quickly, "because there's no way I'd be interested in Spike for any other reason. And that's interested in a platonic, researchy way. Because you wouldn't think I would be interested in Spike for other reasons. Because I wouldn't be."

Giles kept staring.

"Because he's evil. And it's wrong and…what?"

"Yes Buffy, quite right. Actually I don't need your assistance after all so you can head straight to patrol if you like." He stared back at the page, hoping she would just leave.

"But I thought you wanted me to help you research your family and stuff."

He chuckled nervously. "I did, but the information I received isn't as much of a breakthrough as I thought. Quite a dead end in fact."

"Oh, well. Let me know when you do find your family. It would be nice to see more Giles' down here. Although I don't think Sunnydale could cope with much more tweed." She wrinkled her nose.

"Ha, ha – very clever. Go patrol!" he ordered.

"Sheesh." She grinned and walked out the door, bumping into Spike.

"Watch where you're going Slayer!" he growled, pushing past her.

"Why? Is the big bad vampire going to hurt me? Oh please don't hurt me Mr Vampire! I am but a weak and defenseless girl and your impotency is so threatening." She mocked.

He growled and charged at her only to reel back in pain. Buffy laughed. "Jus' you wait slayer. When this bloody chip is out, You'll be the first one I come after" he leaned in close to her ear. "I'll make it hurt in all the wrong places. I'll make you beg. Then, when you're in so much pain you'll give anything to make it stop. I'll sink my teeth into your throat and drink."

Her heart rate picked up. Somehow she didn't think he was talking about killing her. He smirked at her obvious reaction and stepped back, closing the door on her angry face. Still smirking he spun around to face the Watcher. "What's up gramps?"

Giles dropped the glass of scotch.

"Tsk, tsk Watcher. You're shakin' like a leaf. It wouldn't happen to be the evilness of my presence, would it?" he said hopefully.

Giles gave him a look.

"Didn't think so" he muttered with a sigh. "Take a seat old man. I'll get the nectar."

Giles gratefully moved to his chair and watched the vampire fill two glasses, dropping one onto the table in front of him.

"I know you didn't bring me here to research Rupert. Even you have to know there's no bloody way I'd agree to such torture. So why am I here?"

Giles took off his glasses. "I've been trying, rather unsuccessfully, to find out about my family."

"Seems a bit recent for my uses."

"Indeed. However it's become clear that my ancestors went by a different name to my parents. I asked you here in hopes of identifying that name, as it appears you had a common acquaintance. A Simon Rowe."

"Ah, Mr. Rowe. I knew his great-grand. Used to teach philosophy at Oxford and said I had a talent for it. Funny, I showed up on his doorstep after I became a vampire and the sod wasn't even scared of me. Fangs an' all." He laughed. "Bugger invited me in for a drink and spent the entire evening grillin' me on the finer points of evil. Simon was always a brat 'though. Drained him dry in the late seventies. Don't think his great-grand would have minded. Probably would've drained him 'imself if he had the teeth."

"Thank you for that little detour down memory lane."

Spike ignored the sarcasm. "So he knew your folks, huh?"

"Yes. Actually, I believe they were in business together. My parents had a hold in a law firm with Mr. Rowe. Earlier in the firm's history, there's mention of another partner. A Pratt. It's probably no relation but I thought..."

"Pratt, Rowe and Worth?" Spike said..

"Worth? Oh that's good news, I was beginning to think that…"

"_You_, were involved with Giles' parents" Buffy said from the corner.

"What happened to patrol?" Giles asked.

"Apparently there's a demon fighting tournament on and the evils of the world are busy eating Cheetos." She said.

Spike silently stared at the Watcher. Giles turned to him, resisting the urge to giggle with relief. "Thank you Spike, you've been a great help and I'll get straight on to researching the Worth family. Wouldn't have a first name by any chance, would you?"

Spike shook his head as if clearing a thought and smirked. "His name was Robert Worth, an older vampire than I when 'e got staked. Puts things into prospective, don't it?"

"It certainly does. Wait a minute - he was a vampire? Vampire's can't have children! You must be mistaken."

"I bloody well hope not. Man fought like a maniac. Be bloody insulting if I almost got my arse kicked by an ordinary man. Course 'm not so concerned 'bout that since the wanker had fangs."

"B-but then he couldn't be a relation. Unless he had a sibling?"

"He had many and ate 'em all with a bottle of Don."

Giles frowned. "Do you know of any other names associated with Rowe?"

Spike smiled and stood, rocking on his heels. "Now, Michael was a bright one. Got married, had a kid. Did the whole while picket fence bit. Never met 'im in person, but you know what it's like with family. Gotta keep an eye on 'em. Like instinct."

"Is that why Angel won't kill you? Family instinct?" Buffy said.

He glared sharply at her. "One; Angel is not family. Two; he can't kill me. Three; the grown-ups are trying to talk here kiddo, don't interrupt." He turned back to Giles, who now sat back in his chair with a grimace on his face.

"Surely you drained your family line. All the council's books say so."

"Yeah, the same books that say I was a drunken, sodomizing serial killer before I was turned." He shook his head. "The poofters had to set up shop in England, bloody insult to the country if you ask me."

"Are you telling me you didn't kill your relatives?" Giles said in shock.

His eyes darkened. "I killed _a_ relative. One was enough for me. The others lived long and pathetically mortal lives."

Giles sighed. "Well, that's it then." He stared at the man in front of him.

Spike smiled and opened his arms wide. "Come give your Grand a hug then."

"Wha- _You're_ related to Spike!"

"Remotely" Giles protested. "What would that make you then, my great-great-great-great Uncle?"

" 'M not sure how many greats, but yeah my brother would be your direct line."

"_You_ are related to _Giles_!"

Both continued to ignore her. "If you kept in contact then surely you know of other descendants."

"Not so much contact as making sure they're still alive. Never spoke to any of them. When Michael left the firm to become a watcher, I stopped checking. He was still a Pratt then. Don't know why 'e would have changed his name."

"Probably had to do with you."

"Likely. Couldn't be easy being a watcher associated with the William the Bloody."

Buffy stepped in front of him. "There is no way _you_ are related to Giles."

"Wasn't always this sexy pet, had my human days too."

Giles walked up close to him and removed his glasses, perusing his face. "There is some familiarity there. It's hard to tell with the bleach but it's there."

"Guess the brains came from his mother's side" Buffy muttered.

"Dunno, pet. The Pratts have always been the intellectual sort" Spike piped up.

"Really?" Giles said interested.

"Yeah." He smirked. "Came hand in hand with rebellion. Your grandpa spent his teen years stealin' cars and stripping 'em for parts before he became a lawyer. Don't know about your Da, but your Ripper phase falls in with a long-held Pratt tradition." He smiled proudly.

Buffy rolled her eyes. "This is too weird, even for Sunnydale."

"The Pratt line lives on. Let's celebrate!" Spike threw an arm around Giles' shoulders and steered him towards the door.

"Where are we going?" Giles asked curiously.

"There's a demon bar I think you'll like. Full of old demons that'll love brushing up your history. Charge reasonable prices for blood too."

"Oh!" Giles said eagerly. The chance to peek into demon history one even the most restrained librarian couldn't pass up. "Do they have drinks for the human population? I'm not certain, but I'm pretty sure blood won't…" they walked out the door without looking back at the stunned Slayer.

_What the hell just happened?_

Spike's head came around the door with a grin. "You comin' Slayer?"

She stared at him and shrugged. "Oh what the hell" she said and followed him out the door.

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Blue button. It makes me happy.**_

_**If I screw up (and very likely I will). Let me know where because the idiot that I am will **_

_**most likely do it repeatedly. **_


	7. QRS

_**AN: I hate a brooding Spike. Always saw him as a man of action. Jus' sayin'**_

_**-Question – After Spike finds out Buffy's put up the barrier in 'Crush'.**_

_**-Red – A little sexy silliness. Early Spike hmm…let's say season 2. Evil vampire…meet a less slayery Slayer. **_

_**-Split – The crypt conversation at the end of 'As You Were' goes another way.**_

_**Rated M**__** – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. If it requires a rating, it could be here.**_

_**Disclaimer: You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. You want something continued? Also let me know. And yeah – requests too.**_

* * *

Ξ**Question** Ξ

Spike stared at the closed door. He could feel her leaning back on the other side and knew it had nothing to do with regret. If anything, it was probably to contain the hysterical laughter at having reduced a Master vampire to a sniveling wimp. That hurt more than anything. She was about to walk away, he could feel her push back. He knew what he had to do, what he needed.

"Buffy!" he yelled through the door.

"Are you _still_ out there? This is really pathetic, even for you. Go. Away." Her muffled voice came back.

He gritted his teeth. "Can I ask you one question?"

"No."

"One question and I'll leave you alone."

She sighed loudly. "What is it? And I am _not_ opening this door, so don't even think it."

He hesitated. Did he really want to know the answer? The truth was yes. He did. He needed to know exactly where he stood, who he was. "Would you care if I was dust?" His voice came sure and neutral. No hint of his previous whine, no hurt or anger. He was quite proud of himself.

The door opened and she stared at him skeptically. He kept his face blank and his eyes cold. She stared for a few more minutes before smirking. "No Spike. I wouldn't care if you were dust. You're a vampire. I kill _creatures_ like you every day. You annoy me more than any one of them, so no. Having you out of my life would be a blessing. The fact that you're still here is why I'm convinced the Powers hate me."

He choked back the pain he hoped his face hadn't given away and gave her a sharp nod. Then turned and marched back to the cemetery without a word. He knew if he spoke, he'd cry. And vampires don't cry. Especially not in front of the Slayer.

Three feet from his crypt, he stopped. The pain in his chest lifted as an idea started to take form. Not the usual 'kill the Slayer' bit. It was more than obvious he had never be able do that. He looked up at the night sky and smiled. It wasn't the kind of thing he'd do. Surviving over a century didn't come from giving up. But the William in him saw poetry in the act. Giving the woman he loved the only thing she wanted from him, fulfilling his own original quest. A slow dusting, and the death of his third Slayer.

He walked towards his crypt and hoisted himself onto the roof, swinging his legs over the edge. Frowning, he removed his duster and laid it beside him. She'd find it with his ashes, and know what he'd done. With a breath of release, he sunk back and watched the stars disappear.

**ψψψ**

Xander was running from a vampire and cursing the truth of Willow's 'demon magnet' title. Too far from Giles or Buffy's, and no stake. He was a dead man.

Unless he visited a dead man.

With a weak gasp, he darted through the cemetery gates and bolted towards Spike's crypt. He'd be asleep and probably grumpy. And there was that undeniable sense of lethal intent between them. Spike wouldn't turn him down, would he? An image of the vampire laughing at his dying body and sinking his fangs into Xander's corpse flashed through his head. Suddenly it didn't seem like such a good idea. Especially after what he did to Buffy. He tempered a glance behind him at the snarling she-vamp and quickly changed his mind. '_Great idea. The best freakin' idea in world_.'

"Spppiiiiikkke" he screamed, still fifty meters from the crypt. The vamp tackled him to the ground and her teeth opened up over his neck. _This is it! Live on the Hellmouth, end up as vamp food. Did I expect any different?_ He waited for the teeth to pierce his skin and when they didn't, he cautiously opened an eye. The vamp stilled, mouth fell in a scream just before she exploded into dust, an annoyed Spike standing in her place.

Xander waited tensely for Spike's traditional snappy comment. When it didn't come, he looked up and noticed the vampire was offering his hand. "Uh…thanks" he said and let Spike help him up.

"Don't mention it" he mumbled and walked away.

"I won't. Not going to help your case with Buffy, even if you did just save my life." He sneered and dusted himself off.

"Go home Whelp!"

If he didn't know any better, Xander would almost think Spike sounded…tired. _Well, it _is_ just before dawn, he was probably heading for bed_. Then he noticed what had been bothering him since Spike showed up. He wasn't wearing the duster. Trying to think of an excuse, he followed behind the blonde until they reached his crypt. It took a lot to truly shock Xander after his years in Sunnydale, but Spike did it. He climbed onto the roof of his crypt and stared at the sky. Something about that scene clicked in Xander's head, and without hesitation – he turned and ran.

**ψψψ**

Buffy woke up convinced the house was collapsing around her. Then she realized it was a banging noise. _I'll kill him_. There was only one person stupid enough to knock on her door that early in the morning. Still grumbling, she threw on a robe and headed downstairs. The knocking grew louder, more urgent. "I'm coming, I'm coming" she yawned and focused her not-happy-Buffy face, clenching a fist at her side. No sooner had the door opened, her fist shot out and hit Xander in the nose. _Xander?_

"Oh! Oh my god. Xander I'm so sorry…I"

"We'll talk about my broken nose later. Buffy you have to go see Spike."

She scowled. "I'm not going to see that evil, soulless, son-of-a…"

"Buffy!" he frowned at her, "He's going to dust himself."

"_What!_" why that idea made her so angry was beyond her understanding. And she was definitely not going to think about it.

"I saw him on top of his crypt, staring at the sky. I think it's safe to say what was going through his head." His eyes narrowed in suspicion. "What did you say to him?"

She gave him a guilty look and went to reply when she noticed how light it was already. "Oh my god" she whispered. "Xander, stay with Dawn."

Her heart was beating a million miles a minute as she ran through the streets. _Indirect sunlight is okay, it's not light enough yet, you've got time_. Her eyes traced the approaching dawn. _But not much_. Her legs started to tire from the pace she was keeping but she didn't dare slow down knowing every second could mean everything. Her mind mocked her with her earlier conversation.

"_Would you care if I was dust?"_

"…_Having you out of my life would be a blessing. The fact that you're still here is why I'm convinced the Powers hate me"_

The hurt he tried to hide from her. She'd just pushed him away. The sun was coming too fast, and with a strangled cry she increased her speed and darted through the cemetery. _Spike, you ignorant piece of shit of course I care. All these years beating you down and now's the time you take me seriously?_

There he was, on top of the crypt. Sitting up with his eyes closed and his head tilted towards the rising sun. _No-no-no-no!_ His eyes opened and with a sad smile, he lifted his hand to catch the first rays. _He won't do it,_ she chanted. But he did. The flames appeared almost instantly, igniting the tips of his fingers and tracing down to his palm. With a shriek, she leapt up the crypt wall and ripped him from the roof, throwing him to the ground and pulling his duster down to smother the flames.

His face was a picture of shock and horror that she'd interrupted his little moment of insanity. She glared down at him with a fury she'd never felt before and with one swift movement, kicked down his door and tossed him into the crypt.

"Bloody hell Slayer! Can't you let a vamp die in peace?" he got shakily to his feet and dusted the dirt off his clothes, throwing her an irritated look. A look that died when he saw her.

She walked slowly, menacingly through the door and kicked it shut behind her. Her eyes never left his.

"Wait let me guess. My method of dying is of sincere inconvenience to your precious self. Afraid I'll get dust all over the nice, clean cemetery." He pulled out a smoke and flicked his lighter, using the opportunity to avoid the downright scary look she was giving him. "Well I'll tell you what. You think of the best way for me to dust, and I'll put it to play."

The little blonde screamed in rage and tackled him to the ground sending his lighter skittering across the floor.

"What th-" A fist hit him. Hard. He looked up and another came down. Then she went all out.

"You stupid, pathetic son-of-a-bitch!" she punctuated every word by beating his face. "How DARE you try to dust! You DO NOT get to leave me! You're _my_ vampire. You belong to me. _I_ say when you can leave. Not. You." she shook him roughly, ignoring the tears streaming down her face. "You're _my_ vampire. _Mine!_" she sunk weakly against his chest, feeling it rise and fall in effort to control the pain. "Mine…" she whispered.

Spike's face was a bloody mess, but still grinned at her words. He wondered if she even knew how important they were. Buffy's arms wrapped around him and her head rested on his chest, body shaking with fear or rage, or both. He couldn't help the smug feel that came over him. "Thought you didn't care luv"

She made no move to get off him, but still managed to mumble "I hate you" while her fingers lightly traced patterns through his shirt. Apparently she'd forgotten her statement about being unconscious, and Spike wasn't above taking advantage of said memory loss. Gently running a hand down her arm, he smirked.

"If only you hated me more often."

* * *

**Ξ****Red****Ξ**

Spike collapsed on the ground, holding his head in his hands. The urge to kill the Slayer was all of a sudden more intense. "What did you do to me bitch!" he screamed. Barely able to open his eyes at all, he squinted into the darkness to see the walking Barbie doll stumbling around in pain and then sinking to the ground unconscious. _Okay, so maybe it wasn't her_.

With an angry roar he tried to distance himself from the girl and promptly tripped over a tombstone, and faced the dark.

He felt bad when he woke up. Worse than bad. Downright shitty. He opened his eyes. It was still night, so he obviously wasn't dying. Felt like it though. A hand swung down in front of him and blearily he looked up at its owner. The Slayer was smiling down with cruel intention. He kinda liked it.

"What's with the look, pet? 'S like you're about to go all diabolical on me, which with your brains can't end well."

She gave a sweet smile and helped Spike to his feet. "Aww, is the evil vampire concerned for me? That's so sweet" she ruffled his hair and he darted back warily.

"Eh, what's this then?"

She blinked innocently. "Nothing." She moved towards him and pressed her body to his, snaking a hand down to stroke his cock through his jeans. "Wanna play, Spike?"

"Yeah" he breathed and shot back. "NO! I mean no!"

Her smile turned coy. "I think you do."

Confused and desperately trying to compose himself, he focused on what he knew. "The only thing I want to play at, is _killing_ you."

"Yeah, 'cause you're trying so hard" her tongue curled as she traced his body with her eyes, resting on the bulge in his jeans. "Or getting hard trying."

Spike's jaw dropped. He might not have known the girl well, but he knew the real Slayer wouldn't be acting like he was a free ride at her own personal amusement park. "Now listen, I came to kill the Slayer and you're not her so…sod off."

"No." she walked purposefully towards him and wrapped her arms around his waist

He growled. "I won't tell you again."

"Hmm...guess you'll have to _show_ me" she purred back.

He gripped her to throw her to the ground and kick her in the head, finding he wasn't strong enough. _What. The. Fuck. _

"What's wrong Spikey? Aren't you gonna show me what a big…strong…" her hand slipped inside his pants "…_evil_ vampire you are?"

He gasped and once again tried to struggle away. "What have you done?"

She leaned in close to his ear. "I think you'll be more interested in what I'm going to do" she whispered and swept the tip of her tongue down the column of his throat.

He hissed when he felt her fingernails bite into his chest, blood trickling down over her hand. In a last-ditch effort to stop what promised to be an interesting evening, he brought his leg around to trip her, and his demon screamed in protest. That fact alone made him freeze. It only ever happened with sire's. The Slayer's pupils dilated and the iris turned red. "You weren't trying to get away now, were you?" she said sweetly. He shook his head and she smiled.

Spike wasn't exactly the most resilient vamp to begin with when it came to a woman's 'affection'. Even when that woman was demonically possessed (which he'd had a surprising amount of experience with). He was still evil after all. Buffy threw him against the nearest tree with a strength impressive for even a Slayer. _She'll stake you when she's done _– his inner voice told him. Course, his inner voice stopped when she started licking her way down his naked chest. He could always kill her tomorrow.

**ψψψ**

In the basement of a little house a red-haired witch smiled. Sure that her spell had worked and Spike was now a slave to Buffy's will – which was focused 100 on dusting the evil, evil vamp. With a satisfied sigh, she shut the book and curled up under her covers. Totally convinced she'd solved everyone's problems.

* * *

**Ξ****Split****Ξ**

_  
_She sucked in a breath and continued the spiel, a rhythm she'd tapped out in her head a thousand times. "I'm using you. I can't love you. I'm just ... being weak, and selfish…"

His tone was begging, pleading. Like somehow he could stop what he knew was about to happen. "Really not complaining here." The part of him that was still a warrior said he should be.

"...and it's killing me." She whispered.

Something snapped between the two and silence filled the room. Buffy quickly diverted her eyes, not wanting to see the hurt she knew was there. The last thing she expected was anger.

Something clicked. Like a part of Spike had been locked away until those four words. And it was angry. "It's killing you?" he growled. "It's already killed me! I was never more dead than I was in your arms. Nobody tames me, Slayer. _Nobody_. The thing that I am? It can't be reined in. It can only be suppressed or changed. And let me tell you, something suppressed only stays down so long before it starts fighting for release. So don't tell me it's fucking killing you." He flicked his cigarette at her feet. "There can be no pain where there is no emotion. A little lesson your lover taught me." He moved forward until they were nose-to-nose, gazing darkly down at her. "I fucking love you to the point that it's all that's left after you've burned me away. Tell me now, simple matter of numbers. What do you reckon the pain your lily white self is enduring compares to mine."

She bit back tears she knew she had no right to feel. "I died and went to heaven, Spike. You can't…there's no way you could know what that feels like. And to have it taken away…"

"Shhhyeah. Because I've never died or endured torture, found my release in violence, only have my very nature muzzled. I didn't fall in love with the only person I could never replace. I didn't spend the last cursed weeks touching heaven with demon hands. And I didn't make the mistake of believing as unworthy as I am, that I'd be deemed worthy by you. As for being yanked out of heaven; that would be this then, yeah?"

"It's hardly the same thing."

A faint smile touched his lips before he turned to look around the room.

Buffy's face hardened. _Just useless 'Spike excuses'. He doesn't actually believe them, _she told herself_._ _But when he looks like that you could almost believe he does._ She folded her arms, mask on. "I'm sorry Spike."

"Oh, I'm sure you are luv." He lifted a pack of smokes from the rubble and strolled over to a splintered drawer. He rummaged around a bit and pulled out a small black box.

"What's that?" she asked curiously.

He looked at her. "A dream. A fallacy. A prayer to a demon, I don't know. Doesn't matter now." He slipped it into his coat and brushed past her, heading topside.

It irritated her that he left first. It was like being dismissed and _she_ was supposed to be dismissing _him_. Turning on her heel she followed his steps and found him searching the room and muttering. She watched him sulkily. _Was what they had so meaningless that he's going on with his life? Shouldn't he be groveling and begging her to give him another chance or something of equal level?_ "Using you was wrong and, I'm sorry William" she whispered.

He paused in his search and faced her. "Seems the only way you can treat me like a man is when you're certain of your superiority pet." He continued searching. "Makes me wonder what you consider a man."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He reached behind the sofa and pulled up a half-filled bottle of whiskey. He grinned affectionately at the find before turning back towards her, intense blue eyes carving up her insides. "Jus' wondering is all."

"Ohhh-no.. We're going to talk about this."

"Is that so?" the mocking lilt of his voice an unwelcome throwback to their history.

"Yes."

"Well that should be a right interesting conversation. Glad I won't be present for it." He lifted his keys from the bench and dropped down the hatch. He was already in the sewers when she caught up to him.

"Where do you think you're going?"

He sighed. "Shouldn't you be having that 'life philosophy' session with the walls of my crypt. You could use it."

"Answer the damn question."

His features shifted for a moment before turning back. A warning, or maybe a confession. "Got news for you Slayer, you just effectively broke up with me. It's _killing_ you. To that I say okay, and goodbye. You don't want to see me anymore? Fine with me, just get on with the not seeing me already. I can only go two ways, all in or all out. You're saying 'no' to all in. That leaves all out. So do us both a favor. _Be_. _Out_." He waved an irritated hand down a tunnel leading to her house and kept walking.

It got colder the further he walked away. "Don't leave" she heard herself say.

He stopped but didn't turn around. "What?"

She didn't know. She didn't even mean to say the words. So she let go of the part that did say them. "You're leaving and I don't want you to."

"Why's that Slayer?" he still wouldn't turn around.

"I-I don't know."

Shoes ground on the stray rock as he slowly made his way back to her. His arms came around her and she didn't stop him. His mouth met hers and she didn't stop him. Then he kissed her and she knew. He was leaving.

The small black box came out of his pocket and he wrapped her fingers around it. Whispering in her ear, "whoever you love, love him well."

She watched him walk away and disappear around the corner before her attention snapped back to the box. With a shaky hand she flipped the lid. In the centre of the velvet case was a pendant made of gold, aquamarine and diamond twined around each other in the shape of a dagger. A folded piece of paper was underneath.

_I thought of a ring but it didn't seem right for what we are. The dagger isn't a bold and elusive statement. It's just us. Me. If it is for anything, take it as everything I am. Everything that's yours. _

She dropped everything, save the pendant to the ground, the gold chain curled around her fingers. She stared at the jewel in the palm of her hand for a minute before closing it and running after him. He was long gone when she turned the corner and a sharp wave of panic hit her. What would she say to him anyway? _If she found him_. Taking it on instinct she made a right, mapping the sewers in her mind as she ran. She thought she caught his signature near Willy's. Where he kept his car_._ Her footsteps sped down the tunnel and she scaled the ladder, appearing around the corner from demon bar where the Desoto was usually parked. It was gone.

_No_. Her entire being hurt. He was gone. He'd really left. _Well what did you expect?_ She opened her palm and stared at the dagger again, smiling. Leave it to Spike to think a weapon equaled romance. Strange thing was, for them, it did. _He'll be back_, she told herself. With that, she undid the clasp and slipped it around her neck. He always came back.

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Blue button. It makes me happy.**_

_**If I screw up (and very likely I will). Let me know where because the idiot that I am will**_

_**most likely do it repeatedly.**_


	8. TUV

_**AN: *blink*. There are few scenes in BTVS I hate beyond the realm of human comprehension. Already fixed one, Threat is another (re: singing below). I think I restrained myself admirably. After that is a little bit of nothing. After that is a little bit of something. So there you go.**_

_**-Threat – *sings* I hate Ri-ley I hate Ri-ley lalala. Oh. Uh stakey episode 'Into the Woods' I think. –continues sticking pins in Riley voodoo doll-**_

_**-Unlived – Season 7 post 'Get It Done'. 'Meaning of Life' kinda nothing.**_

_**-Vanquished – Spike's driving off to get his soul. Doesn't even make it out of Sunnydale. Go figure.**_

_**Rated M**__** – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. If it requires a rating, it could be here.**_

_**Disclaimer: You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. You want something continued? Also let me know. And yeah – requests too.**_

* * *

Ξ**Threat**Ξ

Buffy was walking to Spike's. To stake him or thank him she had no idea, but she was going. On one hand, he'd caused her pain for his own selfish reasons. She wasn't so stupid that she thought he'd actually done it for her. But then, he'd saved her from really falling in love with Riley. Which would have been too much for her to handle after the way Angel had left.

She walked into the crypt without her usual aggression, seeing him sitting in the armchair with a bottle of whiskey and eyes glazed. He stared blankly at her face before lifting the bottle again. _He doesn't think I'm really here_, she thought triumphantly. _I can probably get away with anything right now and he wouldn't stop me_. With a smile, she placed one hand on the TV and wondered if crushing it into unidentifiable parts would make her feel better. She frowned and pulled her hand away. She couldn't do that to the TV. It wasn't its fault it lived with Spike. "Are you capable of speaking?" Buffy said.

Spike wasn't entirely drunk, but he was getting there. Obviously drunk enough to start hallucinating because there was no way the Slayer would be in his crypt after what he'd shown her. "Sure. Can talk to you. Talk to Captain Cardboard. Talk to the whole extremely boring family." He shifted a little in the chair and brought the bottle to his lips.

"Riley? Riley came here?"

" 'Bout to" he gestured towards the door and Buffy panicked, ducking behind the chair. "Whatcha doin'," he whined "come back 'ere like a good ghostie."

"Shutup Spike!" Buffy growled.

He chuckled but said nothing.

The door slammed open and Riley marched through it in a dark rage.

"What took you?" Spike paused to put down the amber. "Guess it takes a while to get back to full strength after those bites."

Buffy winced behind the couch and glanced longingly at the bottle in front of her face.

Riley gripped Spike by the shirt and pulled him up out of the chair.

"Hey! Hey, let's be reasonable about this." Spike slurred.

_Yeah, 'cause someone who lets vamps bite him is capable of reason, _Buffy thought_. _

He slammed Spike into the pillar. "You may have noticed, Spike" he said punching him and causing a shot of irritation to go through his well-concealed girlfriend. "I left reasonable about three exits back."

"I think it's easier to believe you never found it mate" Spike muttered loud enough for her to hear. "Look, I'm not the one who got you into this. Don't kill the messenger."

A warning went through Buffy as she caught sight of the stake. Before either could react, Riley shoved it through Spike's chest. Her inner Slayer roared her rage.

"Ow! Bloody hell! Oh god!" _Wait a minute_. They both looked down at his chest. She wondered if someone snuck the Gem of Amara into his drink. Riley yanked the stake out and Spike hissed in pain.

He smiled. "Plastic wood-grain. Looks real, doesn't it?" he paused to grab Spike by his shirt. "Don't think I don't know what's goin' on with you, Spike. Stay away from her. Or we'll do this for real next time."

"There's not going to be a next time" Buffy had jumped up the second the stake hit Spike's chest. Her thoughts were lingering on the increasing pleasure it would be to stake Riley. It was taking a while to get past those thoughts. She walked towards them meeting Spike's curious gaze with one of her own.

"B-B-Buffy!" Riley stuttered and her attention snapped back to the soldier. Much angrier.

"You just staked Spike" she stated.

Her calm tone wasn't fooling anybody. "It's plastic" he reasoned.

"Oh. So it's just to scare him and hurt like hell. A kind of _discipline_?"

He smiled shakily, seemingly pleased she understood. "That's right."

Her eyes narrowed. "What exactly are you disciplining him for?"

Riley gritted his teeth and glared at the smirking vampire. "Trying to come between us."

She murmured a bit. "Well, yeah, he did try." Her eyes lit up. "But you know - I think you just succeeded. Guess that's one point for you." She chirped.

The look of shock was priceless. "Huh?"

The Slayer glare returned and her hand flew out, gripping the soldier tightly around the neck. Not enough to stop him breathing, but enough so he choked on every breath. With deceptive calm, she maneuvered him away from Spike and towards the crypt door. "Spike and I have a very simple relationship. We want to kill each other. Right now we're at a stalemate. He can't bite me, and I can't stake him. But we all know that one day the chip is going to stop working. When that happens, all bets are off. I look forward to that day" she said wistfully. Her tone turned into a low growl. "But until then, _hands off my vampire! _She swung around in a roundhouse kick and Riley flew out the door which promptly slammed shut on the scene. Her lips curled in a satisfied smile. She didn't need to break the TV after all.

"Feelin' better luv?" Spike called from his spot, still leaning on the pillar with blood pouring down his shirt.

She walked towards him and roughly pulled his hand away, inspecting the wound. "Are you going to be able to heal this on your own?"

"Sure. Jus' gotta drink enough blood to replace what I lost. Why do you care?"

She pulled back. "I don't."

He gave her a wounded look and whined. "Why not?" She raised an eyebrow in response, swiping his bottle and his seat before he could move. "Bloody women" he muttered pulling off his torn shirt and heading for the fridge.

She twirled the bottle around in her hands, her face once again curious as she studied him. "So what _is_ going on with you?"

"Huh?"

"Riley said he knew what was going on with you. I want to know what it is."

Her tone dared him not to answer. He was quiet and his eyes were intense and reflective. Finally he shrugged and turned back to the fridge. "I'm in love with you."

She stared blankly at his back. "_Oh_."

"Yeah."

"You know how wrong that is right?"

He smirked. "Still want to kill you."

She shook her head to clear images the confession and the half-naked-Spike in front of her had conjured up. "Good. Because I do too. Want to kill you. Because you're evil."

He leaned back on the bench, pretending not to notice the attention she was giving his body. "Then we're in agreement. There will never be anything between us."

Her eyes snapped to his accusingly. "You just said you loved me."

He smiled. "Except that."

* * *

Ξ**Unlived**Ξ

The old Spike was back. The leather duster, a part of the soul he created before it stopped being enough and a real one took its place. Now it was back and he was too. She glanced at the potentials, now crowded into the living room for something resembling sleep and turned to make her way down to the basement, running into Spike on his way up.

"Can we talk?" she said.

He stared at her for a minute before answering. "No."

Her eyes widened. _Since when?_

The gentle smile on his face indicated he knew exactly what she was thinking. "I mean not now, luv. Gotta go out, get some air, be around something that's not dying. In case you haven't noticed, death is drowning everyone here."

"Oh. Well I'll go with you then." She said grabbing her coat and skipping forward to walk by his side. "So where are we going?"

"Demon club"

She stopped. "You're taking me to a demon club?"

"No" he said slowly, "you're taggin' along to a demon club. I was perfectly fine goin' without you."

"Oh" she frowned. "Can we go somewhere else?"

"No."

"Why not?"

He gave an exasperated sigh. "Because I need to be around the living. People who don't care that the world could end tomorrow, but still care about finding time to enjoy their lives. Wouldn't hurt you either."

"_Demons?_"

"Demons. Immortals tend to lose respect for their own mortality. You live long enough, you learn to accept to concept of death."

"You're dead already."

He laughed. "There's more to living than being alive, pet. You of all people should know that."

"Do you miss it?"

"Bein' alive? Nah. Don't get me wrong, walkin' in the sun would be nice but like most vampires I've seen enough of the mortal crew to know I got the better end of the deal. Take you for instance. Your personal life always had so much drama. Always knew it would be a miracle for you to live into your twenties, had the countdown and you still didn't live your life. Not really. Never gave yourself away without expecting someone to take what you'd given an' run. Livin' is about what you take for your self, not what you give."

"Nice concept" she said as they started walking again.

"Not sayin' it's wrong. Jus' that you did it too often for it to be right."

"I lived. I warded off apocalypses and snuck out at night and…I loved Angel" she frowned when Spike didn't react. "Falling in love is living."

The twinkle in his eye said he knew she was baiting him. _Damn it_. "Being in love is living. If you do it right. Falling in love is like prepping for a lethal injection."

She asked the next slowly. "So if someone came along with some magical ass-kicking thing and you could be human again, would you? Want to I mean."

He pulled a smoke out of his duster and lit it. "I'd rather live my unlife than have a beatin' heart and leave this corpse unlived. Nobody can say I didn't live. Since I died, it's all I've ever done." His eyes were dark and serious as they considered her. "Maybe if you gave it some thought, you'd live too. I could show you how. But you won't. Too much bloody righteousness. Which must be a bitch to define since you've known nothing else."

"I tried on your world once, remember?"

"Protesting all the way."

"I still tried."

He grabbed her without warning and pulled her against him in a gentle embrace that couldn't possibly be mistaken for an attack, his body instantly yielding control. Instinctively she kicked out his feet and slammed her palm into his face. He groaned in pain but still smiled up at her shocked face. "Try harder."

* * *

Ξ**Vanquished**Ξ

The car was rolling steady despite the speed. Away from Sunnydale, the bane of Spike's existence and for all intrinsic purposes, home. Then the pain hit. He swerved over to the side of the road braking as liquid fire filled his veins and sucked out the oxygen. Not that he needed it. He fumbled for the handled and tumbled out gasping for air. A woman stood in front of him, cloaked in imperial blue and looking down with a gentle, knowing smile that in no way offered comfort. "What's goin' on?" he said.

She pulled back the hood of her cloak revealing cropped red hair and sharp amber eyes. "I'm sucking the life out of you. Well, the unlife anyway."

The pain intensified and his demon came to the forefront, his voice a soft demonic rumble that could send the fiercest minion crawling. "_You have no right witch._"

"I am _not_ a witch. Well, I am. But I'm so much more. I wish your pathetic breed could remember that."

The demon growled, sneering at she who would dare defy him. "_This human and I are one. You will not take him._"

"Oh darling, who said anything about taking _him_?"

She opened her palm towards him and the demon gasped, drawing back. The body spasmed violently and dropped to the ground in a whimper. The witches hand glowed brightly and smoldered when she closed her fist. Spike looked up at her in horror, the change undeniable. It was gone. It was gone…and his heart was beating. "_No_" he whispered. She smiled with faux regret.

"I'm sorry William. But your demon was far too rare for me to just pass it by. He'll make a nice addition to my collection."

William stumbled to this feet and flew at the witch. "No! Give it back!" She flicked her wrist, sending him flying into the car. Pain seared up his spine.

She smirked. "Now, now William. That's no way to treat the person who gave you back your soul is it? That is what you wanted."

He gritted his teeth and righted himself. "My soul, not my heartbeat."

She laughed. "Consider it a bonus" and disappeared.

William sunk limply against the car and stared at his hand, now warm with the flow of blood. He wanted to head straight out and get himself turned but knowing that the demon would be different from the one he'd spent a century with didn't appeal. He could have ended up like Angelus. The quest now a bust, he got into his car and drove back to Restfield.

He walked through the door to his crypt and Clem stared at him, his mouth still open and twinkie halfway to his face. One look at his friend and Clem awkwardly wrapped his flabby arms around the former vampire. Normally this would be met with an irritated rant, maybe some British cursing, but William was too distraught to keep up appearances. He rested his head on the demons shoulder and sobbed.

"Spike, buddy, what happened? You're, you're a…"

"Human" William swiped at his face angrily and stepped back. "She took it, my demon."

"Who?"

"The lady in the cloak. Red hair, demon eyes, witch."

Clem nodded. "Erania. I've heard stories. She collects them and mixes their power with her own."

"How do I get it back?" he growled.

"Huh?"

"My demon. Will she trade? How do I get it back?"

"Spike, don't get me wrong, but isn't this a good thing? I mean, you're in love with the Slayer. I would think being human would be – you know - a good thing."

He nodded slowly. "But I'm not me anymore" his blue eyes were dark and sad. "My demon and I are…were….there was no separation. We…we both changed. Now he's gone, and I'm not me anymore."

Clem patted him gently on the back. "Hey, don't think like that. You're probably just tired. Humans tire easily. Go get some sleep. You'll see, things will be better in the morning."

William smiled sadly at his old friend. "Hope so mate, 'cause right now I don't know how I'm going to live like this."

**ψψψ**

Buffy felt nervous about going to see Spike. Nervous but not afraid which she didn't understand. She had woken up that morning with an unexplainable urge to talk to him, or yell at him. She had full intention of yelling at him. An urge that died when she saw Clem in his crypt.

"Uh..Slayer. I…was just leaving. Tell Spike I left him some stuff in the fridge when he wakes up and that I'm still his friend even with…everything." He stumbled nervously towards the door, before turning back. "Go easy on him okay. He's not taking this well."

"Taking what?" she asked but Clem had already walked out.

_Go easy on him? I don't think so_. She opened the hatch and jumped down. Mildly disturbed that she couldn't' feel his signature, even three feet from his sleeping form. Whatever else his attempted rape had done, he was out of her system. She launched a candle and he sat up with a start, his eyes focusing on her. There was something different, something off. And not just the boyish curls now loose around his face making him look adorable and sexy at the same time. Which she _so_ didn't notice. He turned away from her, fists clenching in the sheet like a lifeline. "You shouldn't be here."

"I'll be wherever I want."

He grimaced and swung out of bed, pulling on his jeans and boots. "Fine" he whispered swinging his duster over his bare chest and heading for the sewers. Buffy froze for a moment wondering where he could possibly go now that they were over.

William was wondering why he was taking the sewers if he didn't have to fear daylight. _Old habits die hard_, he thought. Clem was wrong. Things didn't look better in the morning. They looked just as bad, only instead of sadness he felt anger. Anger at having this done to him, effectively castrated by a cheap bitch with a fetish for power. Like he hadn't known enough of those in his lifetime.

Buffy came up beside him, missing the flicker of shock in William's eyes that he hadn't felt her approach. But then he didn't have those handy vampire senses anymore. He growled. "I got my own problems luv, come back in a century or two."

"You tried to rape me Spike."

"William" he muttered.

"What?"

He turned to look at her and said with venom. "Call. Me. William."

"Who cares what your name is! You tried to rape me, _Spike_. Aren't you going to say anything?"

"There's nothin' to say, is there? Already said I was sorry a thousand times. Sorry's not good enough and we both know it. But what else is there? It's done and I can't go back and change it, I can't make up for it, can't force you to deal with it. And I have a feelin' being there to help you through it isn't exactly an option either. All I can do it tell you what I feel. And I feel sorrier than I've ever felt about anything in my unlife and I've done a hell of a lot worse. Or I can stay out of your life and let you live it without having to see my face all the time. That's all I've got."

Her throat closed up as he jumped the nearest ladder and headed for the surface. _Oh my god he's gonna dust himself_. "Spike!"

She raced after him and leapt up to see him standing in full sunlight and staring intensely back at her. "I told you, it's William."

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Blue button. It makes me happy.**_

_**If I screw up (and very likely I will). Let me know where because the idiot that I am will**_

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	9. W

**AN: Nearing the end *smiles* You guys are so great with the reviews. A little fluffy spuffy for the happy ending squad. Fear not - few more letters for snuggly goodness.**

**-Will - Something Blue fic. Will be done spell doesn't quite break the way it should.**

**_Rated M – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. If it requires a rating, it could be here._**

_**Disclaimer: You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. You want something continued? Also let me know. And yeah – requests too.**_

_**

* * *

**_

Ξ**Will**Ξ

"_Let the healing power begin. Let my will be safe again. As these words of peace are spoken, let this harmful spell be broken." _

Lightning flashed and Giles reeled as he suddenly became aware of the blonde couple tonsil tagging in the middle of the floor. "Do you think you might, um, stop that?"

"Stop what?" Buffy murmured around Spike's mouth.

"Oh no! I-I…with the…and the…t-that shouldn't be happening!" Willow cried.

Xander gave her a blank look. "And you came in where?"

"B-but I fixed it. See? No more demony things" she pointed wildly around at the blank space.

"Oh will you all please just sod off! I'm tryin' to show the lady a good time and that won't bloody happen if you all stand around gawkin'" Spike groaned.

"Aww, honey. Are we shy?" Buffy said ruffling his hair.

"Oi!" He smirked. "Never took you for an exhibitionist luv."

She arched as he ran his hands up the back of her shirt. "What can I say? Your big…bad" her fingernails glided down his chest, "tendencies, rub off on a girl." He moaned and continued their noisy bout of face sucking.

"_My god_" Willow's expression nothing but horror.

"Nothing that disgusting could possibly be God's work" Xander replied.

"W-well maybe an evil God?"

"Ixnay on the odgay Will's. Let's not bring down their evil wrath."

"Too late" Giles flinched at a particularly loud slurp. "If there's any mercy let me be blind." He took a step and fell over, arms flailing.

"Giles!" Willow and Xander helped him to his feet. "What happened?"

"It seems I'm blind again."

"Be careful what you wish for eh G-man." Xander joked.

He did his best to glare at Xander. "I may be blind but I still know how to use a crossbow you infernal cretin"

Spike's eyes glittered with mischief. "Ha, cretin. Good one Dad."

"Very nice Spike, now please go back to checking my Slayer for cavities" he spat.

Spike gave a mock salute and returned his attention to Buffy.

"Shouldn't we be stopping them?" Anya said nervously.

"Oh yes, a watcher, an ex-demon, a junior witch without a grasp on her powers, and Xander. I'm sure we'll manage just fine against the combined force of Slayer and Vampire."

"B-Buffy wouldn't hurt us though, would she?"

"Fuckin' Hell." Spike struggled to his feet, Buffy jumped up and wrapped her legs around him, assaulting his neck. "Bu-, Sweet…stop that you stupid bint" he huffed.

Buffy pouted and jumped down, turning away from him.

"Don't be like that luv" he said wrapping his arms around her waist, "I di'n't mean it. Besides, you don't need brains, you're the Slayer."

Her eyes flashed and she stomped out the door.

"What did I say?" he yelled before running after her.

Everyone stood silently contemplating the situation. "We should go after them right?" Xander asked.

"Yes, I suppose we must. They'll be heading to my house I believe."

"What makes you say that?"

Giles pursed his lips and started feeling his way towards the door. "Spike said something about 'family sticking together' and how it would be good for Buffy if we bonded before the wedding. Now if only I could see we could be on our way." His eyes cleared and he looked at Willow in confusion. "This is quite distressing."

"But you have your sight back, that's good." Willow said.

"Unless we run in on a make-up session"

They headed out the crypt entrance and towards Giles' house in silence. Xander was grinning like an idiot "guess I got the better end of the deal huh?" his good mood dropped as they approached the house. Demons covered every inch of lawn. Spike and Buffy stood at the doorway, smiling out over the masses. "This can not be good" Xander muttered.

A scaly green demon with black and blue tusks stepped forward and knelt at Xander's feet. "Oh wise one! Forgive our insolence, we merely wish too bask in the radiant glow your perfection grants on our lowly, unworthy, diseased lives."

Anya snickered.

"What the"

"Hey Xander!" Spike gave him thumbs up. "Good to see you branchin' out mate. I'm proud of you." The compliment, of course, deserving Buffy reward points. The sound of sucking and smacking echoed through the night.

**ψψψ**

"So let's see what we have here" Willow announced in Giles living room. The demons had finally moved on after the Green demon fell to his knees weeping over how 'unworthy' he was of Xander's 'supreme magnificence'. "Giles has selective blindness."

"Yes it's actually quite…amusing. Now that I can turn it off, that is." He giggled but couldn't be blamed for the amount of scotch he drank. "Blind on! Blind off!"

"Uh-huh. Xander has the demon world at his feet."

"Literally" Xander mused, his eyes lighting up in a look of realization that even scared Willow.

"O-okay. And Spike and Buffy…are…geez, cut it out already!"

Spike's hands slid out from the front of Buffy's shirt and an audible zip sounded as Buffy's hand withdrew. They grinned sheepishly at the witch.

She rolled her eyes. "Are insane."

"You guys, I know this is hard to understand but…he's a really good kisser." Buffy grinned mischievously and leaned in to resume the session.

"Sit!" Willow said sternly.

Buffy pouted but managed to sit without further indecency.

Willow glared at the two. "Good. Now I thought I broke that spell. I'm sure I did"

"What words did you use" Anya asked.

" Umm… I said _'Let the healing power begin. Let my will be safe again. As these words of peace are spoken, let this harmful spell be broken.'_"

"Oh, well that explains it." Anya nodded.

Willow paused. "Aren't you gonna add to that?"

She rolled her eyes like it was obvious. "_Everything_ is wrong. Especially when D'Hoffryn is involved. '_Let my will be safe again?_' please. That's just begging to be tampered with."

"I-I don't understand. What I wrong?"

Anya sighed. "It wasn't specific enough. You turned D'Hoffryn down. His job is to stir things up and he's been doing it for a long time. He gave you what you asked for."

"Huh?"

"He made your will safe, and broke the spell on you to keep it safe. He also changed things to be 'peaceful'. Words can be twisted, you should be careful. Giles is blind, when he wants to be. Xander is still a demon magnet but they worship the ground he walks on. Spike and Buffy – well their part wasn't exactly dangerous."

"Maybe not to you" Xander quipped.

Willow jumped up. "Where'd they go?"

Everyone looked to the now vacant seats.

"Oh, this can't be good."

**ψψψ**

They stood at the edge of Giles' bed. Spike pressed his forehead to Buffy's and gazed deeply into her eyes. "I love you"

"I love you too" she said smiling. Her eyelids fell, and she hummed her pleasure against his mouth.

"Pet?"

"Yes Spikey"

He gritted his teeth against the nickname but didn't protest. "How do feel about forever?"

She tugged affectionately on his ear lobe. "Forever?"

"With me." Her eyes snapped to his with sudden intensity. "A claim. You'd be mine forever. I'd be yours" he whispered.

There was silence, and he shrunk and turned away from her scrutiny. Her hand soft and warm turned his face back, eyes glistening with tears. "You'd do that? Bind yourself to me forever?"

"Buffy there's no one but you."

"What about Drusilla" she snarled the name with a rage that shut his inner demons protests up in exchange for amusement.

"Six feet under the worst of my memories. I only want you." He caressed her cheek with the back of his hand. "I know I shouldn't've asked" he lowered his eyes, "can't expect you to want-"

Her lips crashed down on his as he lowered her back onto Giles' bed. "Not…long enough" she murmured as he stripped her in seconds and wasted no time in relaying his affections.

"Whassat luv?" he mumbled in her ear, pinching a nipple with his left hand and pulling her closer with his right.

"Forever with you. It's not long enough. But I want it, with you."

"Are you sure?"

She glared. "Are you suggesting I can't make my own decisions?"

He chuckled and headed downwards. "Not at all. Jus' wanna make sure you're not still all residual about your precious _Angel_."

"Nope-no-residual-oh-mmm-noth" she gasped as he nipped and sucked on her clit, his fingers circling her center.

"Sorry pet, didn't catch that" he chuckled, sending a sweep of air and vibrations through her. She bucked and tried to hit him only managing a loose swat.

"N-n-not funny honey" she growl/moaned. "Defin-ee-tly nothing res-residualy about it." Her head came up in confusion. "What were we talking about?"

"Can't remember" he said moving up her body. "So that's a yes then."

"That's a finish-this-or-I-will-stake-you…otherwise known as 'yes.'" She sighed and wrapped her arms around his neck, sucking on his bottom lip.

His eyes darkened and he grinned mischievously before vamping out against her neck. "Gonna see what you taste like Slayer" he gave her pulse one long lick, "all over."

**ψψψ**

"Winds of fault and fury…"

"Oh for heavens sake! Repeat after me Sabrina"

"Sabrina?"

"The teenage witch with the irritating smile and amusing stuffed cat."

Willow stared blankly. "Wow"

"We have cable" Xander nodded sagely.

"Let my will be undone to what it was before."

Willow blinked. "That's it?"

"Well no, you did the spell. This is just a tack on to correct the mistake."

"Oh. Okay then. I just hope Buffy and Spike are…umm…okay."

"And not…" Xander glanced at Anya quickly stopping the 'making like bunnies' remark.

"Having orgasms in Giles' bed" Anya supplied.

Giles spluttered. "_My_ bed?"

"Don't tell me you can't hear them. Personally I think Spike is holding back. Vampires have a lot of stamina you know. It'll probably take them days t-"

"Thanks Ahn…Willow?"

Willow muttered the few words. Xander and Giles jumped as if shocked.

"Think it worked"

Everyone turned to face Giles' bedroom door. There was nothing but silence.

Giles smiled. "I guess they didn't use my bed after all." His smile fell. "Oh who am I kidding."

**ψψψ**

One second she was blissfully happy, wrapped in the arms of her mate and thinking dreamily about where they would go and what they would do. Spike had fallen asleep telling her about some of the places he thought she might like. She was just thinking it might be fun to go to Tibet when a surge went through her and Spike, jarring him awake.

They looked at each other, eyes widening as reality came back. Confusion, hurt, anger, vulnerability and despair flooded the claim.

"Oh my god, what did we do!" Tears fell down Buffy's face and she ran for the door.

Spike jumped up and gripped her arms, swinging her to face him. "We talk first."

"You don't tell me what to do" she hissed suddenly aware she almost ran out naked.

His hands tightened. "You know we have to. What are we going to do out there? We don't even know what's happened in here."

"I _know_ what happened you pathetically disgusting walking mosquito." She yelled, pushing back the mutual hurt the words inflicted. "You _claimed_ me."

"I asked and you said yes!"

"I didn't know what I was doing!"

"Well, neither did I!"

They broke apart, turning away from each other. She could feel his frustration as he ran his hands through his hair.

"You don't hate me" she whispered.

He tilted his head to the side. "What?"

"T-the claim. I can't feel…why don't you hate me?"

"Because…" his eyes narrowed in thought. She was the Slayer, he should hate her. Plenty of vampires ended up hating their mates, this should be twice as easy since they started out that way. But it wasn't. His eyes widened as his mouth for the words. "Because I love you."

"Liar" she choked.

He laughed wearily. "Can't lie luv, not anymore. Not to you."

"So what, we go from trying to kill each other to best of friends?"

He shrugged seemingly at peace with the sudden change in their relationship. "Can't say it's much of a step pet. Same drive, different purpose." He paused. "Didn't wanna kill you just so you know."

"Ha!"

"Wanted to want to, won't deny that. But you really are irreplaceable" she watched curiously as his eyes glazed over in memory and images of their fights flashed behind her eyes, "there's somethin' in you that makes you better than them. Not just your family and friends, somethin' inside, somethin' stronger. Could've gone in for the kill anytime, doesn't matter how good you are, I still got a century to top what you bring. Kept slackin', wanted the dance. Wanted it with you." He focused on her now dry eyes. "Still want it, if you do."

She stiffened and tuned out the emotions still going crazy between them. She needed a topic, something to piss him off. Something to stop the fuzzy warm feelings directing her eyes to his lips. Fighting was so much easier than talking about this.

He sighed and bowed his head. "Not gonna waste time fightin' Slayer. We could easily spend decades, or even centuries each hating the other. Won't do it. Many things can kill sweetheart, but you can torture for an eternity on emotions alone and that's something worse. So if you want me, I'm here. If you don't, I'll leave. 'S your choice but I won't sit here an' battle it out until we're both half-."

Her lips were on his then next moment. Because in all honesty, she was female and he was half naked. With a weak smile she sunk into his lap and nuzzled his neck, a little smug that he was at her mercy. He scoffed, feeling her rapidly inflating ego. "It's not like I can't tell what you want, just waiting for you to say it."

"It scares me" she murmured.

"What does?"

"How easy it was even under the spell to l…let go." He smiled into her hair. "How easy it was to…"

"Love me."

She raised angry eyes to his. "It's the claim."

"It's us."

"Claims tie people, put emotions there to keep it forever."

"Claims don't work that way luv."

"They have to." She said stubbornly.

He groaned, exasperated and shifted her firmly on his lap to look at him. "Claims are for vampires and unless you don't remember good ol' Angelus, not all vampires are capable of feelin' love. Claims are a link between two people, nothin' more." He paused. "Well there is the territorial thing, and a couple of physical side affects. But that's it. It doesn't create emotions, it shares 'em. You can tell just like you should now, which are yours and which are coming from me."

"So I really…"

"Love me" he smirked proudly.

She glared before something caught her memory. "Territorial?" she smirked. "You're not going to start peeing on the sofa or something are you?"

He narrowed his eyes. "No, but any man who touches you I'll rip into bite-size chunks."

"Hey!"

"And so will you in reverse."

"No I won't"

He smirked.

She pouted. "I won't"

"Will to"

She cocked a brow. "What are you three?"

The humor left his face and he stared at her grim. "What's it to be Slayer?"

**ψψψ**

It almost pissed her off how easy it was. Which of course Spike knew because, hey, _mated_. He'd just give her that knowing smirk which drove her mad (in a bad way), and she'd call him 'Spikey' in a candy-drip voice in retaliation. What she thought was going to be her own personal apocalypse within their little group ended up being 48 hours of yelling, screaming, threatening, crying, cold lectures, and disappointed faces. Then cookies from Willow in the morning, an apologetic smile from Xander with the promise to try and not stake her mate.

Giles was a little harder. Spike took care of it by showing up in full sunlight, not on fire and smirking broadly with a "Hello Rupes, there's somethin' I want to talk about. Care to venture what?" All the recriminations disappeared as kid-with-candy Giles whipped out his notebook.

Surprisingly her mom was okay with it. Actually, her mom had beamed at Spike and barely flinched when reminded that he was a vampire and yes…still evil. She had a feeling there was more there than what Spike was telling her.

Her eyes snapped to her mate, leaning casually over the bar as the waitress got their drinks, a little blonde flirting with him from the stool over.

"Gotta say Buff, lovin' the whipped version of Spike. Free booze." Xander chuckled.

"He probably lifted your wallet" she replied.

Willow grinned while Xander choked. "So everything's good then?"

"Sure. Why wouldn't it be?"

"No reason. Just that I read up on mating and stuff and it's kinda common for mates to get super-jealous and stuff. I guess I was wondering if it's true."

Buffy carefully maintained an innocent-but-not-too face and mentally kicked Spike over the link when he chuckled. "Nope. No jealousy here. Everything's perfect." Her eyes once more met Spike's, that tarty blonde still trying to attract his attention. Her inner Slayer snarled_. Mine-mine-mine-mine-mine. _She was at his side without even realizing she'd moved. _'Jealous luv?_' Spike chuckled over the link.

Yeah it was so easy for him. Nobody took a chance when he was around, big scary and glaring. He hardly ever had to get physical. _Mmm physical Spi-ike_. She smiled sweetly "Hi honey, how's the drinks?"

"Almost up."

"Fantastic" she purred and looked disdainfully at the blonde. Her voice could've frozen Africa "hello. My name's Buffy, you should leave now."

The girl smiled nervously and backed off. Buffy turned and grinned smugly at Spike, her little 'spats' usually ended in tears.

He just winked and handed her a couple of glasses as they headed back to their table, Xander's wallet in hand.

* * *

**_Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Green button (ooo..new button). It makes me happy._**

**_If I screw up (and very likely I will). Let me know where because the idiot that I am will_**

**_most likely do it repeatedly._**


	10. XY

_**AN: Let the weirdness continue on through to Z. Still very much of the new with smutting it up. But a girls gotta try right?**_

_**-Xenos –Is it cheating to go with Xenos? X words suck. Xenos is Greek for stranger. A lil smut *scuffs shyly* to darken your night.**_

_**-Yield –Not all people are part of the anti-vamp mix. Buffy meets a little competition and gains a little perspective. **_

_**Rated M**__** – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. If it requires a rating, it could be here.**_

_**Disclaimer: You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. You want something continued? Also let me know. And yeah – requests too.**_

* * *

Ξ**Xenos**Ξ

That slip and slide feeling when he walked up beside her mysterious-crush-not-boyfriend with a cocky swagger and killer smirk. He whispered something close to Angel's ear and for a moment she thought the normally calm and brooding companion lost control of his demon. The stranger chuckled softly and backed away with a mock bow. His eyes caught hers and traffic stopped. Bluer than blue with a glimmer of evil that confirmed he was a vampire she wouldn't be able to treat lightly. Not that she wanted to treat him lightly.

The stranger winked once before turning and walking out through the peak-Bronze crowd. He didn't look back. Buffy walked towards Angel with a smile on her face. "Who was that?"

Angel shuffled nervously. "Oh him? Nothing, he's just part of my family. You know, from before."

"Pre-soul Angel?" she turned to look at where the hottie used to be. "What is he, your younger brother?"

Angel growled and she backed away his face showing instant regret. "I'm sorry Buffy. He just brings out the worst of me. We never really got along, too pig-headed. I don't want you associating with that kind of filth. You're better than that." He looked at her with gentle concerned eyes that made her feel like she was the most important thing in the world.

"You're so sweet when you worry"

He smiled. "Oh and before I forget the reason I'm here tonight, there's a nest down on Locke street planning a ritual using children for the sacrifice tomorrow. You should get over there and stop them."

She sighed. Why was it that every time she saw him there was always 'something happening' or 'someone after you' or 'certain evil but I don't know what'. "Fine. I'll do it tomorrow. I'm sure I can squeeze it in after school and before Willow's birthday party. It'll only take, what - five minutes?"

He frowned in an oh-so-Giles manner. "This is serious Buffy. If you don't get there in time…"

"Oh, let me guess, it'd be bad. Super bad. Because this is the Hellmouth and everything that is remotely interesting is bad."

"You find sacrificing children to a Hell-God interesting?"

She pouted. "Well the vampires might."

He rolled his eyes before smiling shyly. "I don't want anything bad to happen to you. I know it seems like every time I show up it's to place you in a life-or-death situation but I really do care Buffy. I'm just trying to help."

"I know that Angel, and I really appreciate it. Hey, do you think you might want to come help me kick some…" her eyes had flickered away for a second and Angel disappeared into the usual nothingness. "Damn"

Partying mood officially over, she went back to Xander and Willow. Willow drooling over her best-friend while Xander pretended not to notice and searched for undercover supermodels in the crowd. His eyes lit up when she reached them. "Hey Buff, leaving so soon?"

"Yeah. Angel came by and kinda sapped all my pep."

"Man that guy is like a leech"

"And, with the blood" Willow nodded.

"Ease up guys. He's just not used to having fun. Giles says he spent like one hundred years eating rats and getting all mucky."

"I think it stuck" Xander muttered.

"And to that I say goodbye. See you tomorrow Will"

"Bye Buffy" they chimed.

No sooner had she made it out of the Bronze, a cold shiver ran down her spine. She fumbled through her purse for a stake. "Damn vampires and their lack of regard for curfews" she muttered.

Her eyes widened at the silky voice behind her. " 'S not that we don't have any regard for 'em, but that we see more fun in breakin' 'em. Rules made to be broken and such." She knew instantly who it was and froze when she felt his cool breath on her neck. "Saw you talkin' to Peaches, luv. Now of what interest is a dirty, nasty vampire to an innocent young Slayer such as yourself? Minus the plank of wood you would take to 'is heart." Fingers skimmed the length of her arm and she jumped away from him, latching onto her stake. He laughed.

"_Vampire_" she stated, fixing a glare.

He had the nerve to slip his hands into his pockets. "You've caught me. Damn. And I was trying so hard to hide it. Oh well, would you like to stake me now or shall we chat some more?"

She ran at him, dodging right and attacking left. He kicked out hard on the left, sending her flying back into the wall. She flipped to her feet and approached him with more caution. He moved light, senses tuned to her every move in almost precognitive response. His very being radiating one word. _Power_.

He waited for her to make a move with a grin on his face, and she threw a series of punches. As anticipated he caught her fist and she quickly pulled her knee into his chest and lashed out, kicking his shin. He hooked her leg, pulling and sending her crashing to the ground. She was straddled in a second, wrists pinned above her head.

"I win" he whispered and lowered his teeth to her neck. Buffy struggled, but couldn't get free. His lips caressed her pulse and his tongue sent a beat through her body. She stilled as he grazed the skin with his blunt teeth. "What's my prize?"

"Huh?" she breathed. It seemed incredibly obvious to her. Vampire. Blood. Not that difficult.

He jumped up and pulled her to her feet, taking advantage of her confusion to back her against the wall.

"What do you think you're…" His lips met hers, tongue instantly gaining entry to her mouth. _Oh_. His hands pulled her tight against the bulge of his jeans, moving against her with practiced ease. He didn't speak, he didn't need to. His body spoke for him, building a heat too slow for hers to handle. A foreign need throbbed between her legs, the taste of liquor and cigarettes suddenly a heady concoction awakening a new hunger. She moaned into his mouth and wrapped a leg around him, grinding desperately and cooing nothing discernable to human ears.

It happened quickly. So quickly that his huskily drawled warning barely registered before something thick and hard slid between her thighs and pushed up into her slick channel. He paused just barely inside her and drew her gaze to his own. His blue eyes glinted wickedly in the moonlight, mischief betrayed by dark intent.

_What am I doing?_ She started to pull out and gasped when the friction sent sweet shocks down to her toes. Her body clutched him tightly and her nails drew blood through his shirt. Lips automatically sought his and he answered with vigor, hands skimming over her hips. Dammit, she was the Slayer and nobody stood in the way of what she wanted. She wanted him. In. _Now_. Her mouth opened to make the demand and cut off in a whine as he thrust hard into her

It was a second of pain before her body battled for more. She shuffled against him, unable to voice what she wanted, but still hopeful he understood. Slowly, he pulled out before sliding in once more. He murmured something in her ear but she wasn't listening. Slow and steady he kept the agonizing pace as her limbs scrambled to latch herself firmly to his hips. _More_, her body cried and she bucked against him, a whimper escaping to join the other sounds that filled the air. When her lips parted she felt the absent presence of a name.

She'd lost her virginity against an alley wall to a man whose name she didn't even know.

_Why couldn't she seem to care?_

Still, she had to fix it. "Name" she demanded and congratulated herself on verbalizing something beyond grunts and groans. He froze and she hit him over the head.

He grinned devilishly. "Spike"

She snorted. _What kind of a name is that?_ He quickened pace, ramming her hard against the wall with each punishing drive.

She hissed and pushed back as best she could with the limited room he allowed, a stream of obscenities tipping her tongue as his swept over the swell of her breasts, dipping beneath her bra. He held her hips tight enough to break, each increasingly violent thrust drawing the words from her mind to his lips.

Pressure mounted, the heat unbearable and her cries desperate. She cried his name, writhing in his arms, and contracted around him. Vaguely aware of his moaning and increasing pace, she convulsed and came, the slightest whisper echoing from her choked throat. She recovered enough to watch in fascination as he followed her over the edge, warmth spilling inside her, leaving him lax against the wall. They sank to the street in each others arms.

"Y-y-you're evil" she managed without the slightest trace of the contempt she was trying for.

He smirked. "What tipped you off - The fight, the fangs or the fact I just took you against this wall?"

She shot quickly to her feet. If he hadn't jumped up to grab her she would have probably fallen, wall or no wall. She looked up into his eyes, suddenly aware of what he was. "You need to move back now" she said softly.

He shrugged and took a step back, each going through the same awkward process of fixing their clothes. She looked back at him. Blue eyes, muscle, and leather. A look of amusement and fascination on his face, no hint of regret or disgust. "You need to leave now" she whispered.

He stepped forward and cupped her face in his hand. His eyes saw everything, she was sure they did. They had to have seen her traitorous mind whining away for him to stay. But he smiled, kissed her softly at the corner of her mouth and walked away.

**ψψψ**

It was two months later when she saw him again. A lazy shadow against a tree in the cemetery. He stretched like a cat before pushing off from the trunk and strolling towards her. Her mind was torn between staking him and jumping him, mostly for the same reasons. He snarled "Slayer" in her ear and wrapped his arms around her waist, nuzzling her neck. Really, she had no option but to hold him back.

Like she had no option but to kiss him, touch him, run her fingers through his hair.

And honestly it was the trees fault she ended up pressed against it, moaning his name.

* * *

Ξ**Yield**Ξ

It started with a gift.

One little box with black and silver wrapping left outside his crypt.

If he was alive he would have died from the shock.

As it was, he picked it up and turned it over in his hands. No card, no label, nothing to indicate who it could have possibly come from. So naturally he thought it was a bomb.

Now bombs _could_ kill him seeing as exploding into itty bitty pieces is hardly a recoverable experience. So he sat it on the sarcophagus in his crypt and eyed it skeptically for a good half hour before it hit that should it have been a bomb, he would have heard the ticking or whirring. Super vampire senses an' all.

With an evil snort he pulled off the wrapping and opened the box. Inside was a stiletto, with a diamond cross-section and line of emerald along the hilt, crossed with black leather. He picked it up and twirled it in his hands. A work of art only a connoisseur of death and destruction, such as himself, could appreciate.

"Oooh, pretty!" came a voice from the door and the Buffy walked in reaching for the weapon. She pouted when he held it out of reach and growled. "Who would give _you_ a present? It's not like vampires celebrate Christmas."

He frowned at that. Who _would_ give him a gift? It had to be someone who knew him well, but everyone in that category hated him. The only people who didn't were Dawn and Clem.

A soft knock sounded on the door and both Buffy and Spike whipped their head towards it. Spike groaned when a tiny hand hooked around the opening. A girl peeked around, grinning brightly. "Uncle Spike, my mommy wants ta know if you got the present she left."

Buffy hitched an eyebrow and turned to Spike, who looked away. "Uh…is this the one luv?"

"Yeah, that's it! Do you like it Uncle Spike?"

"Sure do sweet. Tell your mum she sure knows how to spoil a vamp"

She giggled and bounced into the crypt jumping into Spike's reluctant arms. "Mommy let me pick the color"

"Well you did a hell of a job kitten. 'S my favorite."

She beamed.

"Where is your mum anyway?"

"Gone to visit my da. She asked if I could stay for a while."

"Ain't got much for a little one, 'cept the TV. A couple of books downstairs if you like."

"Okay" she struggled and he let her down, watching her disappear through the hatch.

He turned back to Buffy looking uncomfortable. "Somethin' you want pet?"

"Who was that?"

"Hannah."

She waited for him to elaborate.

He didn't.

"And how do you know Hannah?"

" 'S my business. You wouldn't come 'ere if you didn't have a bloody good reason. Now are you going to tell me or bugger off?"

She huffed. "Just came by to see if you could watch Dawn after school tomorrow. I really don't want her alone with Glory around."

"Sure thing" he waved towards the door, "send the bit down, got nothin' better to do." He plonked himself in the chair making it clear she was being dismissed. When she didn't leave he eyed her cautiously.

"I'm not leaving you alone with a child."

His eyes darkened. "You're not. 'er mum is. Now if ya got nothin' better to say, leave."

"She obviously doesn't know what you are"

"Yeah, that's right. She thinks 'm an average Joe. Who lives in a crypt, keeps blood in the fridge and cops one hell of a tan if he wanders out during the day. That's why she sent 'er daughter _through a graveyard_ in the middle of the night. Because she doesn't know."

"Why would a human leave her daughter in your care?"

"Again, not your business."

"I'm making it my business."

"Well that's too bad. Cause 'm not tellin' you a bloody thing." They glared at each other.

"Uncle Spike! Can you come read this one to me?"

Spike sighed and stood up. "Look pet, my life…err…unlife doesn't revolve around you and your little Scooby squad. You don't see me screening every last prat you run across, so don't come 'ere thinkin' you can do the same."

Buffy stood gaping as he climbed down the hatch. Maybe she _was_ being unreasonable. How many times had she found Dawn safely stalking him around the crypt? She picked up the stiletto, tracing the edges. It was expensive. Too expensive for it to be given to just anyone. Whoever this woman was she must know Spike pretty well. Then there is the whole 'uncle' thing.

She knocked back the stab of jealousy at the idea that Spike might be on such good terms with someone other than her. Not that they were on good terms. Just that if Spike was in love with her he really shouldn't be hanging around with any slutty homemaker types that came his way. Yeah. She totally had a right to be jealous. Or angry. It was definitely anger.

Before her train of thought could pass into awkward territory, she dropped down the hatch. Hannah was curled up in the crook of Spike's arm with her eyes firmly glued to the book. Spike rolled his eyes when she entered and she smiled sweetly in return. "Thought I would stick around for the story if it's okay with Hannah."

Hannah smiled and nodded shyly. Spike looked ready to say something but stopped and shook his head when she sat down beside Hannah. "_And the vampire turned to his two childer with an evil glare on his decrepit face and said, 'I'm going to take over the world_'"

The story sounded vaguely familiar.

But it wasn't the story that grabbed Buffy's attention. It was the soft, almost affectionate look on Spike's face while he read, and the gentle lull of his cockney tone. The way Hannah's eyes fell shut as if she were perfectly safe in the lair of a vampire. He shut the book when she fell asleep and gently eased her against the pillows.

Buffy picked up the book and smirked at the cover. "You got that from 'Remedy's analysis of mediocrity in western society'?"

"Bit can't read, 's not like I have a wide selection of children's books on hand and they'd probably bore her if I did."

She looked down at the sleeping girl. "She trusts you."

"Never given 'er reason not to. Is it so hard to think I might be worth trusting?" he said softly.

She looked into his sad blue eyes and the snappy comment froze on her tongue. "No" she said.

Heavy footsteps walked through the crypt and made their way down the ladder. "Spike?" a pretty brunette called as she came down. She stood with her arms folded at the foot of the stairs, blue jeans riding low on her hips and a pink tank showing off her perfect figure. If the green eyed monster was real, Buffy was losing the fight. "How's she been?" she smiled warmly and walked towards them.

"She's okay. I mean, it doesn't do well for a vamps ego when 'is face extracts giggles instead of heart-stopping terror, but otherwise fine."

She scooped Hannah into her arms. Her laughter was like music and Buffy's eyes narrowed. "Oh who's this?" she asked giving Buffy a definite size-up and dismissing her as unworthy competition.

"Ah, meet the Slayer, Buffy."

"Ohh." The understanding look on her face brought a smile to Buffy's lips. Until she saw it followed by contempt. "I'm Jean. Spike's told me a lot about you." From her clipped tone it was obvious the impression was far from favorable.

She blinked innocently. "Wish I could say the same."

Spike looked nervously at the open hostility between the two. "So how did it go with her da?"

"About as well as can be expected. Yelling, screaming, threats" she sighed. "Sometimes I wonder how I could have ever married that man."

"Love makes you do crazy things pet."

She smiled. "Touché. I don't know where I'd be if we didn't have you to take care of us."

He laughed. "If you need takin' care of, I think the rest of the world's in trouble." He scratched the back of his head, embarrassed. "Got the knife luv, beautiful piece of work."

"Thanks. I made it myself. You don't see many around now days, they're great for piercing the more armored demon skins. I fought this demon once in Tokyo, he had like a shell on the front and acid mucus or something on his back. That was a nightmare. Started carrying one after that, it really helps."

"Can imagine."

"Okay, well thanks for watching her. She's really taken a shine to you."

"Anytime"

She smiled and planted a kiss on his cheek before heading back up the stairs and out the door.

Spike shifted uncomfortably under Buffy's piercing glare. "Somethin' wrong luv?"

"Who's she?"

"Jean."

"Yeah I got that."

Spike sighed and got off the bed. "She's a demon hunter. Married a demon, didn't turn out so well."

"A demon _hunter_ who married a _demon_."

"Kind of like a vampire slayer who dated a vampire."

"That's different, he had a…"

"Soul. Yes. Got it. The whole bloody tale is permanently imprinted on my brain. No need to ever speak of it again." He headed upstairs with Buffy close behind.

"Well a soul is important."

"Yes it is."

"So why would she marry a demon?"

He picked up a bottle and poured a carefully measured glass. "Don't need a soul for everything pet. But I really don't expect you to understand that anymore. A soul is guidance. Tells you right from wrong, helps you pick right most of the time and clips you when you go off center. Some people or _things_ as you prefer, don't need it."

"But…"

"Nope, sorry. Shouldn't have said anythin'. Not gettin' into this with you again luv. You won't get it cause you don't want to. Now you can see the little one's safely away from the big bad, we've covered tomorrow for the Bit. Off you go."

Buffy hopped from one foot to the other, irritated and curious. Then more irritated because she was curious. "Just tell me why"

"Why what?"

"Why some don't need it but others do."

He looked into the bottom of his glass. "Lots of reasons."

"Why don't you?"

His eyes shot up, with that look of awe and disbelief she'd grown accustomed to.

"I mean, you say you love me. If it's true then you think you're in that category. So what's your reason?"

"I have you."

She looked away from the sincerity in his eyes, battling the inclination to run.

"You really don't get what you mean to me, do you. Don't think a man…a vamp can change because Angelus hurt you. The difference between me and him? As love's designated bitch I do whatever I have to, to be worthy of it. I don't have the soul to guide me, but I have you. I'll weight my conscious on what makes you happy. Makes me yours and I know you know that. Suppose I don't really care. The chip got me to loving you and love will get me the rest of the way. Even if you never see it."

He was in front of her now and his hand caressed her cheek and slipped to the back of her neck. "Now I'm pretty sure tomorrow you're going to forget every word you've stayed to hear tonight. So I'm going to take advantage of your unusually obliging behavior and kiss you." She was frozen in place as his lips descended on hers. Slowly and sensually he worshiped her mouth, carefully avoiding all but the slightest brush of bodies. The one hand on her neck held her to him and for the life of her she couldn't pull away. His warm breath whispered against her lips as he pulled back, leaving her heavy lidded and wanting.

She came back to herself, eyes widening and meeting his with panic and a little anger. He took a step back as she ran for the exit, stopping with her back to him in the doorway. "Spike I…"

"Never happened luv."

Her fingers dug into the wood. "I see it. I thought you should know. Maybe one day I'll understand it." She turned slightly with a small smile, "then maybe one day it won't hurt to love you. But I'm not there yet."

He stood staring at the door long after she left before making his way back to his chair and pouring another glass of whiskey.

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Green button. It makes me happy.**_

_**If I screw up (and very likely I will). Let me know where because the idiot that I am will**_

_**most likely do it repeatedly.**_


	11. Z

_**AN: *Sighs* The last one. It's been fun kids. This one wanted to go on and on and on. Just wouldn't stop. But I made it stop because I have a short attention span and, well, not fond of Riley. **_

_**-Z - Zulu –Goes AU after Spike gets captured by the Initiative. **_

_**Rated M – Those of you who know my work know everything has coarse language. If it requires a rating, it could be here.**_

_**Disclaimer: You want to use a stub – you can, just let me know. You want something continued? Also let me know. And yeah – requests too.**_

* * *

Ξ**Zulu**Ξ

His standard issue boots echoed down the cold, sterile hallway with the checked confidence of strength undermined. The sway of his duster brushing over crisp black jeans and a button-down shirt, dog tags heavy around his neck. Not enough to interfere with his orders, but enough to act as a reminder that they were orders. By now they thought he'd forgotten. Like he'd forget he was a vampire every morning when he looked in the mirror and nobody stared back.

No he hadn't forgotten.

Blue eyes seemed to barely scan the still figures with guns as he passed them by. Cold, but respectful. Steadfast, but yielding. But he was scanning, and he saw it all. Saw the difference in the looks he received, from disgust to respect. He passed one particular soldier and gave him a short nod as they watched him pass with barely restrained awe.

Because he was here, roaming loose in a clean-painted cell under the illusion that he was free. A sharp rap on the door and a curt reply to come in. He stood stiffly in front of his Superior. She took off her reading glasses and threw them on the desk, eyeing him with a fond smile.

"At ease, Jack. We've come too far for ceremony."

_Jack_. The lowest of the face cards but still more than a number.

He smiled warmly and relaxed his shoulders. "Maggie. You're looking well."

"I'm afraid I can't say the same." She leaned back in her chair and nodded towards the casual figure on the couch. "Riley here thinks you need some R&R."

He frowned and turned to the twinkling eyes of his friend. "Finn been mouthin' off again Ma'am?" he smirked, "I'd be happy to take 'im down a few notches. For the benefit of the mission, of course."

She laughed. "Oh, of course. Actually we're all quite impressed with your progress. The hostiles are proving themselves more useful than we could have ever imagined. And we all know it is largely due to your involvement."

Jack was a good soldier. He beamed. "Thankyou ma'am, but I couldn't have succeeded without the opportunity."

Maggie Walsh waved a dismissive hand. "Opportunity is what you make it. But pleasantries are not why I called you here. This is." She held out a folder and he took it, eyes widening when he read what was inside.

"Ma'am?"

"You've earned it Jack. I understand you've only been outside for one or two nights at a time, and then only for missions and drills."

_So that's how she wants to play it_. "My place is in the Initiative."

She smiled. "Yes it is. However, our intention is not to be your prison Jack. I trust you are well educated in all aspects of your new lifestyle. The blood you drink here is the same as you will find out there in the Butchers shop, and it's time for you to reintegrate yourself into human society. I'm giving both you and Riley a fortnights leave. He will assist in your reemergence."

_In more ways than one_. "'Course he will. How else is he gonna get a woman's attention?"

Riley yelped. "Hey man, I don't need you to help me get women. This uniform does more than the bad boy look ever will." At Maggie's warning glance he added, "and I already have a girl."

He chuckled dryly, unable to shake the bitter taste in his mouth. "Sure you do. The girlfriend who's part goddess. Hope she appreciates all the talk up you give 'er, cause that's all it is."

"Hey!" his eyes glazed over, "she's perfect. She's pure and kind. Beautiful and strong. I can't wait for you to meet her."

"No woman's perfect, mate. But if there was such a thing I'd trust you'd find 'er."

Riley grinned. "Yep. I sure can pick 'em."

Maggie continued to smile through their talking. Riley was an idiot, and Jack was playing the hand perfectly. Yes the file contained papers for his leave. Two weeks off for good behavior, as it was. Along with a profile of the latest conflict in the Initiative's project. Buffy Summers.

Riley draped a friendly arm over Jack's shoulder and steered him out the door. "Two weeks, just us and the open…Hellmouth."

He shrugged him off and pointed a finger. "Don't you get any ideas, mate. One of the first things I'm gonna do is find a bar. Then maybe a good fuck and the remote. Not shuffle behind your pathetic self all day."

"Aww, you know you love me."

"Won't admit to nothin'. But even if I did, I'd love the TV more."

"Well that's really no competition. TV is God." They smiled and headed out from the Initiative.

The cool, crisp folder burned in his hand. So they wanted him to kill the Slayer? He chuckled at their gall. Obviously they thought they had him completely under thumb. They were wrong.

He bantered. He smiled. He obeyed their orders and played their games.

But no, he didn't forget.

His name was Spike.

**ψψψ**

"Oh _come on_ Jack!"

"Riley. I'm tired. If I don't get some sleep 'm gonna crash in the middle of dinner. What would your goddess say then?"

The surprisingly courteous soldier had already set a bunk up in his basement and it was only his bulky, country-boy arse standing in the way of Spike and dreamland. He wondered, not for the first time, whether the boy had been given orders too. Though he didn't think they were the same, he had to wonder what they were.

"You're a freaking vampire! How could you sleep at night?" he smirked. "And you can stop with the good soldier routine. Relax. It's just us."

"If you mean go around bitin' and killin' like the good ol' days. Thanks but no thanks. Don't fancy a zap to the head at the moment."

"You know that's not what I meant. Ease up on the language bro' let loose." He spread his arms wide.

Spike smiled and rocked on his heels, hands fisted in his pockets. "Right then. Get your soddin' flab outtta the way 'fore I pull that stick out your arse and shove it back down your bloody throat."

His eyes widened. "Oh that's good. _Threatening_. I mean, I was really scared."

"Sod off."

"She wants to meet you and I told her she could tonight."

"You told her about me?"

"Well yeah. Not the vampire thing because…well…you'll find out tonight. But you're my best-bud."

"Your what now?"

"Don't deny it."

" 'M gonna."

"Fine" he sighed. "Deny it. It's still true."

"Whatever mate. Stop for smokes an' I might be able to stay awake long enough to say hello, but no promises."

Riley smiled. "That's all I ask."

_Is it?_ He couldn't help the sneaking suspicion that whatever happened at the end of his 'mission', Riley would be the one to dust him.

**ψψψ**

Buffy threw yet another unworthy outfit on the bed and tugged at her hair with a growl. Why was nothing she owned even close to right for this kind of thing?

"I don't see what the problem is" Dawn piped from the bed. "It's just Riley."

She whirled around. "It's not just Riley" she hissed. "It's Riley and God."

"I thought it was just a friend."

"Not _just_ a friend. _The_ friend. The one whose opinion means everything." She rifled through her wardrobe and muttered, "you should hear him talk about this guy. Best fighter he's ever seen, blah, blah, blah. Flawless technique. Saved my life. Blah, blah, blah." Another outfit hit the pile. "Jack told me this joke, Jack nailed a demon all by himself in six seconds flat, Jack knows everything about everything. Trust me Dawn, Jack is God."

"Well maybe you should ditch Riley and trade up." Dawn smiled evilly.

Buffy sighed and walked over to her sister, stroking her hair. "I know you don't really like Riley, but please give him a chance. For me?"

Dawn nodded her consent, both sisters knowing nothing would change her attitude.

Once more Buffy frowned at her wardrobe. "You're my sister. You have an obligation to help me pick something to wear."

"Okay." She reached into the wardrobe and pulled out a black calf-length skirt and an off-shoulder white top. "Wear these with your boots and pull your hair back." Convinced she'd done her bit, she left her sister holding the clothes.

Buffy held them up to the mirror and shrieked when she caught the reflection of her clock. It would have to do. Forty minutes spent getting ready and she leaped down the stairs. "Bye mom!" she yelled, rushing out the door.

A sigh of relief left her lips when she realized they hadn't arrived. It gave her time to calm her nerves. She grabbed a booth and settled in, waving away the waitress. _Okay Buffy. You're the Slayer. You can totally do the meet-the-friend thing. Oh God I hope this works_. Her fear intensified as she caught sight of Riley heading towards her, a partially hidden figure following behind.

She watched Jack as his body slowly emerged. Black boots, tight black jeans, black shirt loosely skimming a muscular chest, dog tags, leather duster. She gasped when she took in his face. _Spike_.

**ψψψ**

The lingering scent taunted him from the entrance, immediately putting him on alert. The Slayer was here and he had a feeling she wouldn't be too receptive to his new policy on biting. He only hoped he could deal with the girlfriend before she saw him.

"There she is!" Riley said excitedly.

Spike couldn't see past his bulk but managed to push his way after him. The scent got stronger the further he went until it was obvious if she hadn't spotted him yet, the Slayer would definitely have him by the end of the night. Not that he couldn't take her, because in truth he could. It's just that he didn't really have it in for her yet, and that made him nervous.

He looked up and suddenly found himself staring into two beautiful green eyes, widened in surprise. It was only then that he realized Riley was talking.

"Jack, this is Buffy. Buffy, Jack." He walked around to Buffy's side and planted a kiss on her cheek, scooting in beside her.

Buffy the Slayer. Buffy his target. Handed to him on a silver platter. If it were possible he would have died from shock. _I really should have finished reading that file_.

They stared at each other before Buffy narrowed her eyes. "Spike." she spat.

He pushed his hands into his pockets and gave her a nod. "Slayer."

Riley grinned, happily oblivious to the tension that came with those words. "You had a run in with the Slayer? You didn't tell me! To think that all this time I put off telling you her name and you'd already met."

Buffy jumped up, stake in hand and charged.

"Buffy, no!" Riley yelled.

The stake came down and Spike caught it mid-air, not forcing it back but holding it still. He met her look as she gritted her teeth and pushed harder. His arm didn't even show the strain of her efforts. "Slayer. Be a good girl now, and put that piece of wood away. You're making the natives restless."

She looked around to see several people giving her curious looks. With a cry of frustration she drew back, tucking the stake into her bag. "We'll continue this later."

"Don't think so luv. Got places to be."

She glared and slid back into the booth. Riley gaped in horror at her actions. "How could you do that?"

Her look softened when she turned to him. "Riley, he's a vampire."

"I know that!" he ran a hand through his hair angrily. "He's also my friend."

Buffy turned to Spike her look searching. "_You're_ friends with a vampire?"

Spike shrugged. "I like to think of it as a simmering hatred that will never blossom into violence."

Riley smirked. "Simmering hatred?"

"Gotta keep my rep somehow white bread."

"Spike is evil."

"We call him Jack now."

"Well then Jack is evil."

Riley narrowed his eyes and Buffy shrunk back obviously picking up that calling 'Jack' evil was not going to go down well.

"Is it _evil_, that he saved my life?"

Spike sighed, trying to relieve the tension. "I've been _telling_ you it was an accident."

"Yeah. You accidently tackled me to the ground and sheltered me while they pelted your body with bullets."

Spike shut up.

Riley turned back to the now chastened Buffy. "Is it evil that Jack disobeyed orders and rescued my team after we got caught in the middle of a demon gang war? On his own!"

"Riley, I'm sorry but I've known Spike a lot longer than you and he _is_ evil. He's been trying to kill me for years." Buffy smirked at Spike letting him know exactly what she thought of his 'attempts'.

Riley gave him a strange look. "No he hasn't."

An angry Slayer is a scary Slayer. "Don't tell me what happened! You weren't there. You don't know what kind of an evil creature he is. _I do_."

"That's true, I've only known Jack for a year." He turned to her so she could see the seriousness on his face. "But in that year I've seen him fight ninety percent of the time. If he _had_ tried to kill you, he would have."

Buffy gaped. "You really think I can't beat _that_?" she pointed at Spike.

"Look. Why don't I just go." Spike really didn't like where this was heading.

Luckily Riley seemed to sense the thin ice and softened his tone. "It's not what I think Buffy. It's what I know. You're a brilliant fighter and I know you can kick my ass across the country and back again. But you wouldn't stand a chance against Jack."

She opened her mouth to say something and snapped it shut, turning irritated eyes on Spike. He looked away. "So, _Jack_. You think you can beat me?"

His soldiers mask firmly in place, he turned back to her. "Pet, I didn't come here to fight. I came here to meet Riley's girlfriend an' that just happens to be you. So how 'bout we put our history to rest and handle this like normal folk?"

"We're not normal folk" she hissed. "You're a vampire, I'm a Slayer, and he's a soldier for a secret government organization that experiments on demons. And you didn't answer my question."

"No. I don't think I could beat you." _I know it_. Riley's grin indicated he'd caught the careful wording too.

Unfortunately so did the Slayer. Her eyes narrowed and she opened her mouth to say something. Spike took the opportunity to leave.

"Riles, 'm gonna head out. See you at home, yeah?"

"We're not done here!" Buffy spluttered.

He met her eyes with the first true show of what he was, minus the fangs. Her jaw snapped shut and she leaned away from him. "We're done here" he said quietly and headed out the door.

He made his way through the city ignoring the blood pumping in human veins. He wasn't an idiot. Even without the chip he couldn't feed. His system wouldn't take it. Still, he felt the need for some violence, so he headed for the nearest cemetery.

She was following him and he knew it as soon as he entered the gates. He decided it was a good thing. If she saw him fight something using his real skill, maybe she would just back off. Despite his best intentions, he did like the soldier. He was the first friend who hadn't wanted something from him besides companionship. It wouldn't sit well to have the Slayer take away that one positive in his current life.

His senses tingled and he smiled as he saw a large, ugly demon heading his way._ Well, you've had dinner Slayer. Now here's the show_.

**ψψψ**

Buffy had argued with Riley a bit more before he said those dreaded words.

"Jack is a good friend and I haven't got many of those. He's changed since you knew him and if you can't recognize that, then that's your problem not mine. I know you have history but could you at least _try_ to get along with him? I don't know what I'll do if I have to choose between my best-friend and my girlfriend. Please don't make me choose."

She knew. She could see it in his eyes that if it came down to it, it was bro's before ho's. It made her sick. So she nodded that she would try and told him she needed time to think. Then she left and started tracking Spike.

It was only a little surprising that he hadn't killed anyone on his way to the cemetery, after all, he had the chip. His pace was leisurely, like he had all the time in the world. Her eyes traced his body, automatically calculating the strength and agility exuded. He was a thing of beauty. Evil, but captivating in the moonlight. Like he was made for nothing else. But he would kill her at a moments notice if he could.

_Could he?_

A smile touched his lips and a large demon approached him. He pulled his duster off, tossing it aside and giving her the complete silhouette of his fighting stance. He bounced on his toes, hands twitching in anticipation. The demon charged and Spike leapt out of its way, pulling up and lashing out with a kick that sent it to the ground. He waited for it to get up with an irritated look that said he was hoping for a challenge better than what he was receiving. The demon approached more slowly, and this time Buffy saw.

His eyes sparkled and his body coiled. He punched and kicked with the grace of a dancer, radiating both strength and power. His were moves perfectly coordinated to the demons skill, prolonging the fight yet satisfying the violent need. And he was perfect. Sleek and sharp in all the right places. Her breath quickened and a familiar burn spread from her centre.

_Yes, he could._

He spun the demons legs from under him and took one of his hands, sending him rolling across the dirt. The demons calm wore out and he charged on pure instinct. Spike rolled to the side, jutting a foot out to trip him. It fell, face down and Spike stalked over to it, swinging a leg on either side. Her eyes lingered on those strong, knowing fingers as they slipped around the monsters neck and snapped. He turned and stared into her, blue eyes burning and while a voice was telling her to leave, she couldn't.

Her body sang as he came closer. A relaxed power flowed through every step it took to get to her. None of the cocky swagger, just simple acknowledgment of what he'd never unleashed. She dug her fingers into the bark of the tree and tried to will herself back to sanity, the kind that included a stake and lots of dust.

"Like what you saw, Slayer?" he said, eyes primal and cobalt.

She stood strong, head tilted up condescendingly, "It shows you're still a monster."

He snorted. "Yeah. But then I never claimed not to be. Got a chip, is all. They're not trying to stop me from being a monster. They're jus' trying to make me their kind of monster."

She shivered at the inclination. "For the benefit of mankind."

He smiled. "Tell me in graphic detail how it felt when my sire left."

Her fist flew out and smacked him in the nose.

He laughed and pulled back. "Angry, are we? See that's what happens when people try and do things for 'the good of the people'. Nobody like others making the decisions for them luv. Especially when the person deciding has a yen for the one-track-no-stops mentality."

"This is different."

"Politics always is." She fell silent and he used the opportunity to close the distance. "You're a clever little Slayer. All tricks and spunk. What will happen when they've got every beast from here to Tokyo by the short hairs, I wonder? Denying their nature like a caged animal." He leaned in close and whispered breathily, "how would you feel in a cage?"

She smacked him in the chest, sending him toppling back. "Shutup!" she hissed.

He stood and raised his arms in surrender. "Whatever you say Slayer. Jus' be on my way, never fillin' that delicate little mind with thoughts of the potentially destructive nature." He turned and walked away from her, muttering "wouldn't want you to break a nail" just loud enough for her to catch.

Something nagged at the back of her mind and while she tried to push it away, it didn't stop. "Hey!" she yelled and ran after him. He turned and suddenly she was one short inch from his face. "Uhh…"

His amusement showed in his tone. "Yes?"

She took a step back and folded her arms. "You've never fought like that before, did they give you extra training or something?"

He reeled back, his face guarded and she felt a twinge of pleasure that she'd caught him off guard. "No" he said and went to walk away again.

"Then why did you hold back with me?" she called.

"Dunno. Guess I didn't want you as dead as I thought."

There was no reason those words should have given her the pleasure they did. "Why?"

He turned back to her, almost shyly staring at her under thick lashes. "I guess…well…fighting you was. It was fun. Believe it or not Slayer, you do have some skill to you. More so than the others." His eyes burned into her with an emotion she didn't recognize. "You're my other half. Not in the romantic sense of course. But in the fighting sense, one day you'll be perfect. A pure warrior. 'S the way it should be. You on one side, me on the other."

"Only you're on 'the other' side now."

His eyes glinted. "Am I?" his dark eyes watched her for a moment before he made his move to leave, and once again she stopped him.

"Spike, I-I just wanted to say that…fighting you was fun too."

He smiled and moved closer into her circle. " 'S that right?"

"A-and we should try to get along. Or pretend to get along. For Riley."

He sighed. "Yeah, for the perfect white-bread soldier. You do know how boring white bread is right? I mean, without something else it's just…bread."

"You're his friend."

"That I am. And as his friend I will feel very bad about this tomorrow."

"About wha-"

Her comment was cut off by his cool mouth pressed against hers. A wave went through her when they touched. The soft lips teased hers until they parted allowing their tongues to mingle. He pulled back just as quickly and chuckled when her head followed him. She opened her mouth to retort and he leaned in again, lips hovering near her ear. "I could make you burn Buffy. Could make you beg and plead, sweat in the middle of winter. I could touch everything you keep hidden of that delectable body, make you use every muscle just to keep from going insane. And when it's over and you can't even breathe, I'd run my tongue over your sweet, heated skin and drink my fill of your honey."

Her face was flushed and she hardly knew what she was saying, but she had a sneaking suspicion if he moved away, she might actually die. "Why don't you?" she whispered.

His predatory growl rumbled sweetly through her body. His blunt teeth scraped the side of her neck and she gasped, gripping his arms to hold her. "Don't tempt me" he growled. "There's something you should know about that sweet, gentle boyfriend of yours. The way he looks at you with the unbridled affection. Those chaste, formal kisses that don't burn but make you feel safe. It's a lie." She struggled back, but he held her tight around the waist. "My orders are to kill you Slayer. What do you think his are?" Her eyes widened as she felt him vamp against her neck. His fangs pressed just hard enough to draw blood. She shuddered at the sudden thrill, but he just licked them closed and drew back, returning to his human visage. "Know who you can trust" he whispered" and walked away.

* * *

_**Please review, bash or behead. I love to hear it all. Green button. It makes me happy.**_

_**That's all folks. Z. End of the Alphabet. I've got requests for a continuation of 'Vanquished' and I'll likely continue, but it won't be until after I finish either Fubar or my main original work. Or I don't think so. These things have a habit of getting out of my control. I blame the bunnies.**_

_**Love, Ash.**_


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